The Book of Phylemon

The New 52: Month Three, Week Four

2011-11-26T18:39:00.020-06:00

Last Week, I mentioned that I thought week three was the lowpoint of the month for the new 52. If that is the case, I am happy to say that week four is definitely the highpoint! Lots of good stuff this week.

The Non New 52

2. Shade #2- I like James Robinson. I think I've said before that his version of the Justice League, with the second string members and sly nods to the more obscure corners of DC's history, was ideal to me (better than what I've seen so far from Johns and Lee), and so I'm naturally inclined to like this series. That being said, I'm not sure that an awful lot happens here. Someone is trying to kill Shade, so he goes to ground. He says goodbye to a lot of people, fights a monster named Bete-Noire, and that's about the end of the book. What I can say is that this is not a quick read. Shade's vocabulary is heavy, and quite superior to what one might see in an average modern comic book. This is a good thing. It reminds me of the comics I read in my youth, the kind that forced me to pull out a dictionary and beef up my own personal vocabulary. I definitely felt that I got my money's worth on this issue. Speaking of which . . .

1. DC Comics Presents: The Life Story of the Flash- This was my great value purchase of the week. $7.99 bought me 100 pages of entertainment, many of them dense text pieces that gave me hours of enjoyment. This is the story of Barry Allen as "written" by his wife Iris. The book covers it all, describing his childhood, acquisition of his Speed Force power, major battles (including a detailed look at the "Trial of the Flash" story arc), all the way through his death during the Crisis on Infinite Earths and a quick look at those who have followed in his footsteps. This was originally released in 1997, so the information is a little dated now (well, a lot when you factor in the new 52 reboot), but I was surprised that, despite my standing as a DC Comics geek extraordinaire, there was still information to be discovered here that I did not know already. That's not an easy thing for me to find, so I really enjoyed this story.

The New 52

13. The Savage Hawkman #3- I really want to like this series. Hawkman falls solidly into my niche of B or C list characters who don't get their just dues because they are mired in their own silver-agey goodness (Look, he has big bird wings and a mace!) This interpretation of the character, however, doesn't seem to have much in common with the character that I know and enjoy. This story just isn't that fun. My hope is that it will soon cross over with some other title (much like Captain Atom and the Flash met last week) and that this will ground Hawkman in the DC universe proper more than he has been lately. Maybe this will elevate Carter Hall's story.

12. Blackhawks #3- This series continues to be better than what one might expect (or sales would indicate). In this issue, we discover the main villain, a seemingly eternal dealer in nanotechnology named Mother Machine. There is also a security breach at the Eyrie and, best of all, talking dogs! This series isn't a blockbuster, but it does have its fun moments.

11. Green Lantern New Guardians #3- Kyle Rayner is always going to be my least favorite Green Lantern, but I like the concept of the various colored corps (even if it has been overplayed in the last few years). If the different corps are your thing, this is the comic for you to see them. In this issue we learn that the Guardians are mean little blue midgets and that Glomulus is fearless and a lot of fun. Also, it's nice to see that the evolution of Bleez that happened earlier this month in Red Lanterns is being honored at least to some degree in this story. That sort of continuity is a good thing.

10. Justice League Dark #3- This is a beautiful book. Mikel Janin has an incredible artistic gift. These are also wonderful characters that I really enjoy reading about (although I'm not sure when everyone became capable of seeing Deadman). With all of that being said, I'm still kind of waiting for the story to get started. The heroes are gathering to fight the threat of the Enchantress, and after three issues, they are still gathering. I think this story will be something really good if it picks up the pace some. Also, this may be my least favorite version of Zatanna's costume (personally I prefer the red, white, and blue version from her Justice League Detroit days).

9. Firestorm #3- This title moves up a few a spots in my list this month because Gail Simone finally gets to do what she does so well, create a creepy villain. This issue introduces us to Helix, the first individual to undergo the Firestorm Protocol, an attempt to create a nuclear superhero that goes horribly wrong. Helix is frightening, not only because of his physical power, but also because of how well Gail Simone (and Ethan Van Scriver in fairness) writes a disturbed character. Firestorm still isn't the best series in the new 52 (When Firestorm isn't a composite being you lose some of what has made this character special and unique), but the overall conspiracy theory theme of this series has a lot to recommend it.

8. Batman The Dark Knight #3- There is not any doubt that this is the "pretty" Batman book. David Finch's art is over-the-top and perfectly on display here. The result is a beautiful book that is light on real plot. What plot there is, however, is done well. Batman, in pursuit of the pretty and mysterious White Rabbit (the girl on the cover), does battle with a super sized Joker (sort of), teams up with the Flash (that guy is everywhere this month), and sets his sights on Poison Ivy. Much like in Green Lantern New Guardians, it was nice to see a bit of continuity, as Bats makes mention of Ivy's association with the Birds of Prey here.

7. The Flash #3- Okay, a little backstory to start here. Last issue we learned that Barry's brain can access the Speed Force as easily as his body can, granting him a form of super intelligence or precognitive ability (he can mentally run through the consequences of every choice at super speed, thus allowing him to make the right decision every time). This issue, we learned that this new power comes with some dangerous consequences. We also get to see Barry Allen riding a horse as drawn by Francis Manapul, who is really doing an excellent job on the art on this book. This is a beautiful book that I'm really enjoying.

6. Voodoo #3- Voodoo gets her cross over this month! Unfortunately, she has to team up with Kyle Rayner to get it. Still, Ron Marz tones down the sexy this issue (although Sami Basri's art is still beautiful), allowing the plot to actually take center stage. Voodoo is on the run, out to fulfill whatever her mysterious mission might be. I don't have any experience with this character, and I can't even tell you if she is a hero or villain, but her story is compelling and interesting. I want to see where this is going.

5. Teen Titans #3- I had no greater surprise this week than enjoying this comic as much as I did. There are so many reasons not to like it. Obviously, anything with the title Teen Titans is going to be compared to the seminal work of Marv Wolfman and George Perez. Not only is this series not as good as that run was, but because of the whole reboot thing it denies the existence of that work (which is a heresy in my opinion). In addition, this issue features the debut of the token homosexual character Bunker. Now, I've long since given up the hope that my conservative values will be reflected in comic books, but an overly flamboyant character whose "sexuality is an important part of his character" (according to the writer) just seems doomed from the start. So it would be fair to say that I went into this wanting to hate this issue. I was surprised, therefore, that when I had finished, I didn't hate it at all. Bunker is admittedly flamboyant, but in a way reminiscent of Changling from the Wolfman / Perez era. I was also surprised to find Bunker more overt about his faith than about his sexuality. Now, the fact that the only character espousing Christian beliefs is an out of the closest homosexual is a whole new topic of conversation, but it is one best saved for another day. The book had a number of good qualities without mentioning the new character. Brett Booth did a wonderful job on the art chores. The opening splash page with Kid Flash, for example, was wonderful, reminding me of those Family Circle strips where the kids took the most circuitous routes to accomplish some simple task. Red Robin is shown as a competent and capable leader who was obviously trained by Batman. The issue had a great balance between comedic moments and great super-heroey action. I still don't think this series will ever reach the heights of its forefathers, but I am beginning to think that it may be worthy of calling itself a Titans book (it's at least as good as Team Titans).

4. All Star Western #3- This issue is a little awkward, basically tying up the loose ends of the first arc before launching into the next story. We also have here the end of the Jonah Hex - Dr. Arkham partnership which, if a permanent split, makes me sad. One of the real joys of this series so far has been the interaction between these two very different personalities. Hex's roughneck brutality makes him a wild and unpredictable character, but those traits are best put on display when they are set in contrast to the refinement and civility of Arkham. I'm hopeful that this is just an intermission in what has thus far been a really cool "buddy movie" type relationship. The back up, featuring El Diablo, was also fun, showcasing a zombie attack in the old west drawn by the legendary Jordi Bernet. I appreciate the efforts to introduce us to the New 52 versions of these classic western characters, and even more so when it is done while showing respect to the greats who have done this their whole lives.

3. I, Vampire #3- I've really been enjoying this series. The art is dark and beautiful. The story is compelling and heart breaking. This issue was just a touch less engrossing to me than the previous two, largely because the point of view switched from our protagonist Andrew Bennett to a sidekick, Professor John Troughton. This change in voice, while probably necessary to convey the information we discover in the issue, robbed the story of some of its emotional appeal. Still, it is one of my favorite series in the new 52. Next month the title will guest star Batman, which will probably improve sales, although I think this is one of the few times that a crossover will not help the storyline.

2. Aquaman #3- Geoff Johns writes a good super hero story. Ivan Reis draws a beautiful super hero story. Together it is near perfect. Aquaman encounters the Trench (the ugly guys on the cover there) a species he has never encountered before. That seems weird but, as we are often reminded in this issue, the ocean is a big place. Johns does a masterful job of not only moving this story forward, but planting some seeds for what is to come (How did Aquaman get his trident? How far will Mr. Shin go to find Atlantis?). This issue balances the out and out super heroic action with humor (not sure why, but the "Aquaman is lame" scenarios that Johns refutes make me laugh every time). Aquaman is written as noble (without being as grumpy as he is often portrayed), Mera is beautiful and ferocious in combat, and Reis draws dogs as cute as buttons.

1. Superman #3- Far more than any other writer in the New 52, George Perez gets what great comics should be. Superman is in the midst of telling a big overarching story about some strange alien menaces that are plaguing Metropolis in general and Superman in particular. Lots of other comics are also telling large multi-issue stories. The difference is that when I pick up Superman #3, it doesn't feel like chapter three in a lengthy story. As revolutionary as it seems in today's comic market, George Perez isn't writing for the trade. He recognizes (in that old Stan Lee adage) that every comic is somebody's first comic, so the way he writes is different. For one thing, unobtrusively, Perez reminds us of what has already happened. He doesn't take a lot of room in doing it, but if issue #3 is your first time picking up the story, he will fill in the details you need to know and not leave you feeling as if you have to do some research on Wikipedia before you can start reading the book. As someone who reads more than 100 comics a month, I appreciate the reminder of what happened last time (and in a far more natural format than a text piece on the inside front cover). Secondly, Perez gives you a complete story in this issue. Yes, there are large set pieces that lead into this story or are unresolved at the end of this issue, but if, in 20 years, you were to pick this up out of a back issue bin and it was the only issue you owned, there is still a good story for you just between these covers. I'm being vague here and I'm not sure why. The set up for this story is that Superman is being attacked by different alien menaces each issue. There is some connection between the threats (they are all speaking what I assume is Kryptonese), but within each issue, Superman is confronted by the threat and manages to defeat his alien foe. It's not a complicated plot taken by itself, but it isn't like Perez writes 18 pages of the buildup to the conflict and then gives us the cliffhanger of Superman being blindsided and we have to tune in next month to see if he figures out how to beat the bad guy (and it is even worse, one might suppose, if you only have the next issue where Superman starts the issue unconscious and you have to figure out how that occurred). I know I sound like an old man here (which I am, so at least I'm being authentic) but I appreciate the fact that George Perez recognizes that I spend my $2.99 every month and should get a story for that money, not just a chapter in a trade that might be released some day. We have already learned that Mr. Perez is leaving this title in the next few months, which makes me terribly sad. I hope that his replacements (Dan Jurgens and Keith Giffen) follow the maestros lead here and write solid, complete stories in future issues of Superman.

The New 52: Month Three, Week Three

2011-11-21T14:06:00.021-06:00

I have to start this post with a confession. After three months of observation, I feel safe in saying that week three of the New 52 comics are the lowpoint of the month. There are certainly some great comics out this week, but this is, overall, the week I am least excited about.Before we get into that, though, let's look at:

The Non-New 52

4. Young Justice #10: YJ is in a tough position. It wants to tell a clever mystery. It wants to be inviting to new readers. It wants to pay homage to the greatness of DC Comics past. Any one of these goals is admirable. All three, however, work at cross purposes. Captain Atom sends the kids on a "cold case" to discover the truth of what happened to a Captain Nathaniel Adams. Do even non-regular DC readers not see where this is going? Along the way they meet General Wade Eiling, who is a pretty bad guy in the DC Universe proper. What results, at least for me, is a perfectly fine story that lacks any of the surprise that a good mystery needs.

3. DC Comics Presents- Superman The Kents #1: I'm not sure it is fair for me to review a story that has been out since 1997, but the story was new to me, so here you go. The Kents is the story of the role that Superman's adoptive family played in the early history of Kansas. Historical fiction is not really my favorite genre, but this story played out very well, covering the events of Bloody Kansas and the involvement of John Brown. Ostrander writes a passionate story that is educational without being too heavy handed.

2. My Greatest Adventure #2: I love the fact that DC comics is willing to put out an anthology of this nature. I wish that it could feature the done-in-one style that these type of books featured when they were popular in the 50's and 60's. The art of writing a complete 8 page story is simply lost, I suppose. Anyway, all three stories (Robotman, Garbage Man, and Tanga) are as fun as they are different from one another, so there is something in here you are bound to enjoy.

1. DC Universe Online Legends #17: I have to admit that this title was not one of my favorites when it first began. Although I love playing the actual DCU Online game, and obviously love reading comic books, this series' preoccupation with bouncing between the present day and the nihilistic future established in the early trailer for the game made it difficult for me to really enjoy the book. Lately, however, the emphasis on the different timelines has dwindled, and the book as a whole has become more cohesive and fun. This issue is a prime example. Issue 17 features a large scale battle between the Sinestro Corps and the forces of the evil Braniac. The Guardians of the Universe send the Green Lantern Corps on a mission that raises moral questions for Hal Jordan who, in a fashion typical for the test pilot, takes matters into his own hands. This was good stuff.

The New 52

13. Catwoman: Once upon a time, grimm and gritty was all the rage in comic books. Having the "hero" shoot a henchman's kneecap or take a baseball bat to the big bad's head was a surefire way to have a critical and commercial hit. But, that time isn't now, and that sort of storytelling is why I stopped collecting comics for awhile in the 90's. It was good to see Batman still being heroic and saving the villian, though, even standing against Catwoman when she was willing to do wrong. I also enjoyed the fact that the sexual aspect of this title was toned down this episode.

12. Captain Atom #3: Is there anything better than a super-hero team up? This series has been missing something the last few months, but the guest appearance of the Flash in this issue filled that void rather nicely. I haven't been particularly high on Captain Atom since issue #1,but the overarching concept of a being with near god-like powers handling the day to day problems of average people is kind of fun and one I am enjoying.

11. Legion of Super-Heroes #3: The great thing about the Legion of Super Heroes is the depth of their roster. Paul Levitz squeezes 16 members into this issue and somehow makes it all work. I'm also glad to see the Dominators returning as big villians. One of the unwritten rules of the new 52 has seemingly been the creation of brand new villians for every title. Seeing the return of some classic villians makes me very happy.

10. Birds of Prey #3: More so than any title this week, I don't know what to say about Birds of Prey. It is a perfectly acceptable book, and the characters are actually quite fun, but there just doesn't seem to be much here. All of that being said, Swierczynski has left us on quite a cliff-hanger, and I am eager to see how Black Canary escapes her fate.

9. Blue Beetle #3: I'm never going to prefer Jaime Reyes to Ted Kord. Years of reading and loving JLI assures that Ted will always be my Blue Beetle of choice. That being said, Jaime is a good character when judged on his own merit. There is a lot going on in this series, from the internal conflict between Reyes and the scarab, to the duplicity of aunt Tia, to the impending alien invasion. All of it works together for a fairly compelling super hero series. Plus, the Brotherhood of Evil is always a good super villian team, and I'm happy to see them getting some love (even with the pointless costume redesigns).

8. Wonder Woman #3: This issue has received quite a bit of attention already because it features the "new" origin of the Amazing Amazon. I'm torn about this. On one hand, I really loathe retcons. Just on an instinctual level, there is something wrong with moving away from the creator's original intent. On the other hand, this new spin on the origin is both logical and sets up future dramatic moments in the series. On an unrelated note, Cliff Chiang is knocking things out of the ballpark on the art of this series.

7. Red Hood and the Outlaws #3: Since issue #1, I have to admit that I have actively been rooting against this title. Wolfman and Perez's Teen Titans was one of my foundational comic book experiences growing up, so anything associated with those characters is nearly sacrosanct to me. Lobdell's handling of Starfire in issue #1, therefore, upset me as much as it did many others. Fortunately (I suppose), Starfire has kind of moved to the background of this book, and so the book has become more palatable. In this issue, aside from an overly surreal journey, the main thrust of the story is an examination of the most prized memories of our three protagonists. As one can imagine, this gives plenty of opportunity for the reader to get a sense of who these characters are in the new 52. Princess Koriander is a prideful champion who does not suffer fools easily. Roy Harper thrives on being the underdog. Jason Todd suffers from his loss of childhood. All three characters are irreparably dysfunctional, but they are also human characters that we can root for to overcome their weaknesses.

6. Nightwing #3: What is it about a circus? Robin, Deadman, even Ghost Rider find their origins in a traveling attraction. I know that the current arc, featuring Grayson's return to the big top, is meant to be a temporary storyline, but there is so much potential there. Dick Grayson, owner of Haley circus, travels with the crew and fights crime along the way. There is something kind of retro cool about that set up, and I know I would enjoy it.

5. Batman #3: I've been enjoying Scott Snyder's take on the Caped Crusader and, although this was a bit of a down issue, it was still remarkably good. The Court of Owls is an interesting threat, and I'm excited to see where this story goes.

4. DC Universe Presents #3: Before I get into this issue (which was really good), I have to express how excited I am for the next arc in this series. Dan Didio (who has been writing the phenomenal OMAC series) will team up with the legendary Jerry Ordway on Challengers of the Unknown! I could be disappointed with this, but my hopes are very high for what this team can do with that concept. Anyway, the 3rd issue of Deadman's story is as good as the previous issues. Deadman's body jumping antics are just a pretext for a story that is deep and thought provoking. Looking forward to seeing this one through.

3. Supergirl #3: First of all, Mahmud Asrar is really doing a bang up job on the art here. Kara looks like a teenage girl. Beautiful, yes, but age appropriate. Plotwise, the introduction of Simon Tycho provides a good foil for the Maid of Might, and a gelatinous walking brain makes me love this series all the more. This title has been a lot of fun.

2. Green Lantern Corps #3: I think I've said this before, but I'm really loving the way in which Peter Tomasi makes each corpsmen an individual character. The problem with the GLC has always been that they (with a few exceptions) are a wacky bunch of aliens, all with the same uniform and power set. Here, however, Hannu is a very different character than Salaak, who is different from my new favorite (albeit short lived) lantern, Porter. The action, in this issue, is also superb, forcing the Lanterns to face a seemingly insurmountable obstacle. Really liking this series.

1. Justice League #3: Part of me dies inside jumping on the bandwagon here, but this issue was really good, particularly compared to how plodding the series has been thus far. Most of the credit for this goes to Geoff Johns' depiction of Wonder Woman, who is much more fun here than she is in her own comic. Now, don't get me wrong. I still far preferred the Justice League that James Robinson was offering us prior to the reboot, and I long for the day when the tides turn again and the League can be more than just the big players, but Johns writing does a wonderful job of making this an acceptable attempt at the Justice League.

The New 52: Month Three, Week Two

2011-11-12T10:03:00.026-06:00

Man, these weeks come up quickly. Thinking of calling this feature "Last Week's Comics" since, given how many comics I read, I'll never get this out in a timely manner (unless, of course, DC wants to start sending me preview copies of their titles). Thoughts?

Okay, before launching into the New 52 this week, a brief look at the additional titles DC released this week.

4. Penguin: Pain and Prejudice #2: P:PaP, (as I have just now decided to call it), feels like an important comic. It's always interesting to see things from a villian's perspective. I've made no bones about the fact that I prefer my Batman a little more silver-agey, and that is true of the villians as well, but I have to admit that this title makes Penguin a credible and chilling threat. Penguy's Oedipal Complex is something I could live without, however.

3. Star Trek / Legion of Super Heroes #2: I'm cheating a little here, as this title always shows up on Diamond as a production of IDW (probably because it allows them to sell it for $3.99 instead of DC's line standard $2.99). I love classic Star Trek. I love classic LSH. I would love this title just a touch more if they got a move on with the plot. I'm not sure how many issues this mini-series will run, but it needs to be somewhere in the 80's to get the amount of story I am hoping for in this concept at this rate. Finally, after two issues, the two teams meet on the last page of this issue. I am, however, really enjoying the mash-up of the various alien species from both realities. This is full of potential, but cut out the decompression already.

2. Huntress #2: I'm really enjoying this series. The creative team (Paul Levitz writing and Marcus To on pencils) is doing a masterful job of making Helena a dynamic and strong character who is also incredibly feminine. This storyline obviously can't last longer than the six issues we are being offered, but I hope we hear more from the Huntress once this series wraps up.

1. Batman: The Brave and The Bold: I've said this more times lately than I can remember, but Sholly Fisch is a superstar. The writing on this book takes me to my personal comic heyday of the early to mid 80's when comics were fun and smart. In this issue, Mr. Fisch introduces us to the Robin's past, present, and future as they try to save Batman's life. I really enjoyed seeing the different Robins and seeing how they operate differently from one another. I wish I could see this issue (and really the series itself) pencilled by George Perez and running instead of what we see today as Detective Comics.

Okay, on to the New 52 titles this week.

13. Demon Knights #3: DK is certainly the critical darling of the New 52 experiment, and probably the biggest surprise. There is alot that is good about this series, and there is nothing I love more in comics than a good ensemble cast. That being said, there is something about this issue in particular that just wasn't clicking for me. I'm not sure if it is that the writer (Paul Cornell) brings so much of his Britishness to the story, or that this issue was largely about our characters waiting around for something to happen, but I was left cold this time around. Vandal Savage was not as funny as he has been and the other characters (particularly Demon, Horse Woman, and the Shining Knight) were less likable in general. Still, the last couple of pages drew out the right emotional response from me, which means Cornell did his job well even if I didn't notice it at the time.

12. Frankenstein Agent of S.H.A.D.E. #3: I feel like I talk about this every time I pick up this title, but I am distracted by the art here. Intellectually, I think it is the absolute perfect match for the tone of this story. On an experiential level, however, I feel hesitant to even read this knowing that I will have to deal with the art. This is solely a matter of personal preference, however. I like things a little more photo realistic and less busy. Art aside, the story is an over the top action event that is a lot of fun, just don't think too hard about the plot. Frankenstein is an awesome charcter and I am glad that I get to read stories with him in them.

11. Deathstroke #3: Slade is a character that I just can't relate to in any way. The importance of reputation to him is something that I don't understand. That being said, I'm not sure that I have to agree with or even understand Deathstroke's motivations to enjoy the action of this series. Much like Demon Knights, this issue was a step down from what I have seen in the previous two issues, but it was still an exciting issue.

10. Resurrection Man #3: I have no prior connection to any of the characters in this series (which is different than most of the rest of this line), and I think that is the main reason this issue is not higher on my list. The Body Doubles are fun villians and I like the concept of this character. Not sure that much has happened so far, but it is a beautifully illustrated and interesting story so far.

9. Mister Terrific #3: There was no greater surprise for me this week than seeing this title not at the bottom of my list. When Eric Wallace isn't busy telling me that some people are inferior because of the color of their skin, he can tell a pretty compelling story. At the heart of this issue was Michael Holt coming to terms with the fact that heroes have to act in a certain way and the knowledge that their are consequences when heroes step over the line. It's been awhile since I've seen a comic with a good message to it. Enjoyed seeing that this week.

8. Superboy #3: I've enjoyed being reintroduced to this character. This is a pretty radically different take on the character, but it is one that is working. Also, did they just backdoor pilot Gen13 into the DC universe? Interesting.

7. Batgirl #3: Not sure if it is because of Nightwing showing up this issue, but Batgirl is one of the titles that seems to be picking up steam and getting better. This issue is more about relationship, both between Barbara and Dick, but also between Barbara and her father. That personal nature made this issue really effective for me. Good stuff.

6. Suicide Squad #3: There is no argument that Harley Quinn has gotten alot of attention in this reboot. In this issue, in particular, she is both too provocatively dressed and really, really, written out of character. And, somehow, it all kind of works. I'm not saying that she is my favorite part of this series, but Harley as written works in the context of this story really well. Really enjoying the concept and execution on this book.

5. Batwoman #3: I think I have said this before, but J.H. Williams III could illustrate a phone book and it would be high up on my list. Combined with this moody and atmospheric story, though, it is really awesome. On a side note, I really love the Bette Kane Flamebird character and will be very upset if they kill her off.

4. Green Lantern #3: Sinestro is a complex character, and I am enjoying his portrayal here. Coming to understand why he was such a respected Lantern, which is not something that I've really comprehended before. The little touches, like him still being able to teach Hal Jordan how to use his ring better, emphasizes why he is an important character. And, if nothing else, the last page of this issue leaves me wanting more of this title.

3. Legion Lost #3: I have always loved the Legion of Super Heroes. There is an inherent silver-agey goodness to the team that they really haven't been able to completely shake since those halcyon days in Adventure comics. That being said, they have always had two basic struggles. First, the team is just so huge! I love so many of the individual characters, but it is hard for anyone to get screen time when you have literally dozens of characters to play with. Secondly, they have always been a little distant because of their future setting. I like a future that is optimistic and positive (refer back to both my love of LSH and Star Trek), but it is also just a little antiseptic. Legion Lost fixes both of these issues. A small team (and not just the usual heavy hitters that tend to dominate the main title) gives everyone room to be featured, and the idea of those characters in our era (with the limitations that this places on our heroes), makes for some great adventures with great characters. Despite the names on the mast head, this is the main LSH title in my book.

2. Grifter #3: Grifter is the big budget, blockbuster, summer action movie that (hopefully) never ends. This issue featured the ubiquitous tense standoff scene between our protagonist and the well meaning but utterly misinformed law enforcement agent who thinks our protagonist is the bad guy, complete with guns drawn and shadowed bridge setting lighted only by the spotlight of a passing helicopter. The scene ends with explosions, as these things often do. All around, a fun story that is like 20 minutes in a dark, cool theater on a Summer afternoon.

1. Batman and Robin #3 One of my most fundamental beliefs about the DC Universe is that Batman is the most overrated characters in all of comic history. I've always been more of a Superman guy than a Batman guy. Heck, I've always been more of a B'wana Beast or Captain Carrot guy than a Batman guy. Therefore, it is almost painful to me to rank this comic as the best comic this week, but here we are. The writer (Peter Tomasi) understands that at the heart of every good story is the human element, and this works beautifully here. Batman playing the paternal role with Damian, the comical rivalry between Damian and Alfred, the internal struggle within Damian himself, all are played out subtly and brillantly. It is almost cliche to elevate a new villian by making him the physical equal of Batman (think Bane), but "Nobody" is intriguing because he seems to be as psychologically matched with the Dark Knight as he is physically. Also, it was like I could literally hear one of William Dozier's famous voiceovers as I read the last page. Got to love the elaborately designed deathtrap. I will definitely tune in at the same Bat-time on the same Bat-channel to see how the dynamic duo escape.

The New 52: Month Three, Week One

2011-11-08T18:35:00.017-06:00

Some of you know that for the last two months, I have been tweeting my feelings, thoughts, etc., about DC's new 52 titles. Well, sometimes you need more than 140 characters and, well, to be honest, I was kind of feeling bad about filling up everyone's twitstream with my ramblings. So, since this site hasn't been used as of late, I thought this might be a repository for my thoughts. So, without further ado, and in no particular order (except they are totally in order of how much I enjoyed the titles), here are my new 52 thoughts version 3.1

13. Hawk & Dove: I'm not saying anything particularly controversial in stating that Rob Liefeld's art is so emblematic of the 90's that anything he draws seems like it ought to be set in that decade. I'm not a fan of 90's comics though, so I've never really been a fan of Liefeld's art. After three months, though, I'm willing to say at this point that Hawk & Dove would be at the bottom of this list even if George Perez were drawing it. It just isn't clicking for me. Much like Liefeld's art itself, Hawk and Dove are characters best left in a particular time period. Steve Ditko's creations made considerable sense in the turbulent 60's. That isn't to say that these characters couldn't work in a current context (as a matter of fact, the OWS and Tea Party movements seem to indicate a similar political climate exists today), but the whole convoluted avatar pantheon thing takes these characters too far away from where they work the best.

See, told you 140 characters wasn't enough.

12. Static Shock: One of the great promises of the New 52 was that it offered readers a great jumping on point for new titles. Static Shock seems to have missed that memo. Why does his sister have a clone? What happened in Dakota? The sad part is, the story isn't quite compelling enough for me to overlook my questions.

11. Detective Comics: DC's flagship title should be better than this. The Dollmaker is a fairly compelling villian, but this Batman is just too gritty for my tastes.

10. Animal Man: The art on this title is just disturbing. Don't get me wrong, Travel Foreman's art is pitch perfect for this series, but it is just hideous. I'm also not sure that this plot has legs. In my opinion, you don't ensure the longterm viability of a title by telling us that the title character's only contribution to the DC universe was in bringing a daughter into the world.

9. Swamp Thing: Animal Man's spiritual brother is quite a bit better. The art, for one thing, is much more grounded in reality while sacrificing none of the creepiness. The plot, likewise, is more straight horror than the metaphysical weirdness that has defined Animal Man thus far.

8. Batwing: Ben Oliver has a beautiful, photo-realistic art style that elevates this book. I'm not sure that "Batman in Africa" is ever going to be a chart topping concept, but there is a place for this title in the DCU. I'm intrigued to see where this Kingdom storyline goes.

7. Stormwatch: I want to say that I would like this a whole lot better if it featured mainstream DCU characters, but things have been just a touch too surreal so far for me. I am a big fan of the personifications of cities, though. Would like to see more of that.

6. Action Comics: If you don't know, Grant Morrison is one of my least favorite writers. So I want to rank this much lower, and I won't say I'm completely unboard (Krypton, for example, seemed a little off to me). Despite this, there were some enjoyable parts to this. Clark's relationship with his landlady is nice. I'm thankful that in the midst of all the hoopla about isolating him that they have still given Clark some sort of a Ma character. I'm a sucker for a good personal story, so I enjoyed a book with more Clark than Superman.

5. Red Lanterns: Intelligent Bleez may be one of my favorite new characters (although I could live without the butt shot in the last panel). Comics are good when they tell a personal story, and that is what this issue was all about. Also, any story with Dex-Starr gets a little grace from me.

4. Green Arrow: A couple of things right off the bat. First, I miss GA's old costume, not that this is a new 52 thing. Ollie Queen hasn't looked right since the 80's. Second, Any time Green Arrow uses trick arrows, I am going to enjoy the book. Green Arrow #3 features the conclusion of the first story arc of this title. In the modern era, with most storylines going 10-12 issues, A 3 part story feels like a breath of fresh air. That being said, I'd still like to see some good done-in-one issues.All in All, Green Arrow is one of the most straight forward super hero titles in the new 52, and I appreciate that.

3. Men of War: This comic is unapologetically macho, and I mean that as a complete compliment. Now, much like Static Shock, I've got some questions about what is going on, but unlike Static Shock, I'm willing to hold on for the answers. Also, and this may be the Neo-Con in me, but I love, love, love, the back up story we have seen the last three issues that (again, unapologetically) paint members of the U.S. military as (*gasp*) the good guys in the current real world conflicts we face. I'm not sure that this tone will win it readers in a largely liberal comic reading culture (sales bear me out here), but I for one am a proud reader.

2. Justice League International: Two things here. First, team comic books, for me at least, are all about observing the realtionships between the characters, and Dan Jurgens makes this happen better than just about anyone. Whether it is the rivalry between Rocket Red and August General in Iron,or the apparently unwarranted trust between Booster Gold and Batman, or the romantic tension between Rocket Red and Fire, or the almost father-daughter relationship between August General in Iron and Godiva, the interplay between these heroes will bring me back even if I don't enjoy a particular plotline (For the record, I'm enjoying the plot as well so far). Secondly, I love Jurgens callback to the old JLA trick of splitting into smaller teams. That worked well this issue and I would be happy to see more of it.

1. O.M.A.C.: I can feel within myself that this will quickly turn into one of those one note refrains that I tend to have, but I love O.M.A.C. and I think you ought to as well. It is, without a doubt, my favorite title to come out this week and is in my top 5 of all the new 52. This is for one simple reason: O.M.A.C. is fun! It isn't all grim and gritty like a certain pointy-eared vigilante with six titles a month and a ton of over the top violence. It isn't a horror-tinged nightmare that (probably) makes more sense if you have a business relationship going with the saggy-pantsed kid who hangs out in front of the nearest convenience store (that's a drug reference if you aren't hip to the lingo). O.M.A.C. doesn't take itself seriously, is filled with over the top action (not violence, there is a difference), has absolutely horrible puns (The Psi-Fi Man, Omactivate) which are awesome, and Kirby-esque super science. It is like a wormhole through time opens once a month and a newly discovered bit of awesomeness from the "King of Comics" himself drops out. So, if you aren't catching my meaning here, you ought to be reading O.M.A.C.. It isn't life changing literature, but it is a darn fun read that makes me smile every month.

Alright, thanks for reading, and leave a comment if you have something to say.

Hello? Hello? Is this thing on?

2010-05-28T15:04:00.003-05:00

The picture has nothing to do with the post, by the way, but Joanna always says you should have a picture to go with your blog. I remember that much at least. The question is, "Is writing a blog like riding a bicycle?" As sheer boredom lures me back to this abandoned site, will I remember how to go through the motions?

Of course, a larger and more important question is really, "Is there a reason to blog anymore?" Facebook and Twitter can usually satisfy the exhibitionist urge in me with a simple 140 characters, saving untold hours of mental labor as I attempt to find a way to craft my abstract thoughts into a suitably witty form. Seriously, it took me ten minutes to write that last sentence. In some ways, blogging feels like a conversation with my students about 9/11. It's such old news that it doesn't resonate with anyone any more, yet it isn't so out of style as to be retroactively cool again (like the Civil War or World War II, or any of the other "cool" historical events). Of course, I still have a car full of CD's and have never owned an ipod, so I guess being out of style has always been my style.

During the year that I went to the American University in Washington DC, I took a class over political cycles. I remember virttually none of this class (there was no great take away story from this class like there was from the Christian ethics class that was taught by the admitted Atheist), but I do remember a class about the cycle of rebellion. You see, no country has ever had a revolution when things were really good (obviously), nor do people rebel as things are getting worse (there is the part of our brains that says, "Don't worry things have to get better soon"). We don't even rebel when things are as bad as they can be, because we are too busy scraping by an existence to thing about changing our life. No, rebellion only happens when things are starting to get better. When we are not engaged in a life and death struggle for existence, when we can see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it is still out of reach, this is the point when people get so fed up with the system that they cry out for change and are willing to do anything, even commit great acts of violence, to accomplish that change.

All of that to say that I have two more weeks of working with this group of students. I am so close to getting a summer to recharge my batteries and refocus my priorities, but it is still so far away. I have often espoused the belief that at about this time in the year (maybe about a month earlier than this really), that there should be a large assembly, almost an anti-awards ceremony. Each teacher would select the one student that drives them absolutely bonkers. Now what happens to these students in my theory varies depending on exactly how crappy my day has been, but after appropriate public punishment is administered, I think the rest of the kids would figure things out and we could end the rest o the year on a positive note. So, look for that to me my platform when I run for the school board in 2000 and never.

Well, I don't know if this was an exercise worth involving myself in, but if filled up some free time and kept me entertained. Maybe we will try to climb on this metaphorical bike again sometime soon.

Yes, Fall In Boy, I collect all of those titles

2010-02-15T20:14:00.003-06:00

Retreat to Move Forward

2009-01-26T17:46:00.003-06:00

I watched an episode of 30 Rock recently that used the above title as a joke. Jack was going to a corporate function, a retreat, which was all about moving forward into the future. Enjoying a good pun, I laughed as, I suppose, many others who caught the one-liner laughed. I stopped laughing on Sunday when I taught the story of the Good Samaritan to the Bible Class I’ve been working with. In case you forgot, the story goes like this:

A man is walking down the road when some thugs see him, beat him up, and take his stuff. Left for dead, the man can do nothing more than cry out and wait for someone to save him. Before long, a priest, a holy man of God, comes by and sees him. Unfortunately, the priest minds his own business and keeps walking. A Levite, another Jewish holy person, passes by as well, but he likewise does nothing to help. It is only the sinner, the Samaritan, who stops and helps the person in need.

It dawned on me as I taught this that at least part of the reason that the Priest and the Levite refused to help the person in need is that they were on their way to perform their religious duties. The irony is stunning: These men could not be bothered to perform ministry because they were too busy with the “work” of God. Before we are too hard on these folks, I’ve got to tell you that I see a lot of myself in them nowadays.

I have filled my life with service to God. I’m teaching two classes at Church. I’m a Deacon in charge of worship; I’m a leader of my Small Group. In the midst of all of this, I see everything that I am letting slip through the cracks. I haven’t earnestly greeted a visitor in ages because I am too busy running around with a clipboard looking for someone to help out on the communion table. I haven’t volunteered to help someone in need or offered to pray for someone or read the Bible with someone who needed to hear the “Good News” in a very long time. I have no real reason for this, but I am wondering if it is because I am so obsessed with my religious duties that I don’t have time for ministry. Honestly, all of this busyness has replaced my passion. I’ve forgotten what it is like to want to worship instead of having to worship. It is hard to describe, and harder to admit, but my faith has grown stale.

And so we return to the paradoxical idea of retreating in order to move forward. I’m not making any announcements or decisions. I have much more thinking and praying to do. There are those whose guidance I must seek, but don’t be surprised when you see me divesting myself of some of my responsibilities soon. It isn’t backsliding and it isn’t pulling away. What it is is a strategic retreat, giving me the opportunity to find the service opportunities that surround me instead of being blinded by the duties I must perform. It is moving forward to a life defined by unrequired, and therefore uninhibited, faith. The thought of this kind of a life brings me a lot of joy, something I haven’t really felt in a while. I look forward to what awaits.

Hey, Remember when I used to Blog?

2008-12-28T22:36:00.004-06:00

Well, apparently blogging is not like riding a bike. You take a week or so off, and you completely lose the rhythm and before you know it 5 months have gone by and you have done nothing. Of course, it doesn't hurt to have discovered the joys of Facebook, where you can have virtual interaction with dozens of people without dedicating all of the time it takes to compose a blog. Anyway, there is quite a bit that has happened since last I was with you.

1. The Job- I have already mentioned here that in August I started a new position with a new school district. It has been a real change, let me tell you. Moving from Middle School to High School, changing districts, dealing with new people and personalities, and learning a whole new curriculum have made the transition a challenge, but I'm getting the swing of things. There are some truly positive aspects of the job, particulary the opportunity to work with Joanna. It's good to have a friend that you can rely on.

2. Great Wolf Lodge- Jennifer and I had a fun experience with friends a week or so back. Great Wolf Lodge is this really great hotel with an attached indoor water park. The water park was awesome (pictures attached), but I was really blown away by the lodge itself. It was kid-oriented, with the lobby decorated like the wilderness, and since I'm really a kid at heart, I loved it. Because it was the Christmas season it was even more cool, with large Christmas trees and related decor. It was just very warm and inviting, and provided a lot of stress relief during a stressful time.

3. Christmas itself- Speaking of stressful times, Christmas 2008 was not a time of rest. I have lost several hours of sleep playing with all of the wonderful presents I got, including an X-Box 360 (how cool is that?). More than that though, we had a stressful situation on Christmas night itself. Jennifer and I spent the holdiays with her family in Baytown and about 6:30 on Christmas night we heard several loud crashes outside, culminating with one that actually shook the house. Apparently this was with good reason, as a drunk driver had actually driven through the front lawn and into my in-laws' garage. Of course, he hit the garage only after bouncing off my car, causing a bunch of damage and making it undrivable. Luckily, nobody was hurt, even the driver, who fled the scene but was later apprehended after driving into a ditch about a mile away. On a side note, dealing with insurance stuff is never fun.

Okay, it is past my bedtime. I hope you have had the merriest of Christmases, and I will try to write again soon.

What's on my Mind

2008-08-04T18:54:00.005-05:00

I'm feeling contemplative lately. There are some thoughts on my mind, and I'm not sure if I am capable of going into any depth with them, but you are welcome to use them as starting points for your own deep thoughts. So, here we go:

1. I never want to be too smart to believe in God - I'd like to think of myself as an educated, logical kind of guy, but there are things that have to be taken on faith and it's possible to reason yourself into the unreasonable.

2. Heroes should save people - But not even a hero can save someone from themselves. The problem is, what good is being a hero if you can't make a difference when it matters?

3. Education is the eternal enemy of oppression - A society that devalues knowledge is on the brink of ruin. An educated populace will never be enslaved.

4. Great people do great things not because they think they can, but because they know they must - The loss of American ingenuity saddens me. For example, the reason we use gasoline in cars is that it is combustible. Oxygen, in a pure form, is very combustible. A fish's gills extract oxygen from water. Therefore, couldn't someone study a fish's gills, create an engine that mimics this function, and we could realistically have an engine that runs on water. Am I the only one thinking about things like this?

5. For many, there is a space between intention and action - But as a Christian, can I afford that space? I intend to glorify Christ, but do my actions match those intentions? I was watching the "Baby Borrowers" finale a few days ago and it ends with the statement, "All the teenagers say they want to wait to have children." Okay, fair enough, but that intention means nothing if their actions do not mirror those intentions. It is not enough to claim my faith; I must also live it.

6. Ezekiel 3 - I was reading this chapter and it really got to me. "When I say to a wicked man, 'You will surely die,' and you do not warn him or speak out to dissuade him from his evil ways in order to save his life, that wicked man will die for his sin, and I will hold you accountable for his blood." and again, "when a righteous man turns from his righteousness and does evil, and I put a stumbling block before him, he will die. Since you did not warn him, he will die for his sin. The righteous things he did will not be remembered, and I will hold you accountable for his blood." I think we don't want to be seen as judgemental, that people are mature enough to handle themselves, but in this passage God holds us accountable for when we are too scared to help someone find their way.

Cheery thoughts, I know. Anyway, that's where I am right now.

When the words won't come

2008-07-07T16:49:00.005-05:00

Well, what do you know? I'm blogging again. I wouldn't expect this to be a regular habit. As I mentioned on my Mort Game blog, I am now without access to a computer during the day, and can only use Jennifer's when she brings it home from work and isn't using it herself. The problem with waiting so long between blogs is that all the things you teased talking about no longer seem very important. Anyway, I promised I would blog about a couple of things, so I guess here you go:

1. Why the cats were wearing collars- Um, because they were fixed (and declawed) and wanted to take the stitches out. That doesn't seem like much of a story, but they are all better now, if that helps. Here are pictures to prove the point:

That picture really makes me laugh.

2. Joining a Gym - Uh, yeah, we joined a gym. It has a pool, which rocks, but I got a pretty bad sunburn, which does not. I haven't been back since, but I haven't given up on the idea.

3. The joys of cooking class- Jennifer and I went to a cooking class for our 8th wedding anniversary (way back at the beginning of June). It was a lot of fun, and I am really desparate to go again. There is one right before my birthday, but Jennifer is laying down the ultimatum that it is either cooking class or meat on a stick, and I'm not sure I liked the class that much. The class we did go to was really good, as Jennifer learned how to make risotto and I learned that I really like it when Jennifer makes risotto. It was truly fun and I recommend it to any of you with the time, interest, and disposable income.

Okay, new business.

1. I'm clean shaven for the first time in ten years!

Our church VBS was really a lot of fun this year, but I had to grow out my beard to play the part of Andrew / Jairus, and summers in Texas are hot. Anyway, here is the shot for posterity, since the change will likely be short lived.

2. VRCC recently installed new deacons. So, So, SOOOOO happy for these new men who I will be serving beside. Our deaconship was starting to dwindle, so new blood is a very good thing.

3. Job stress - So, I submitted my resignation to the Irving Independent School District and am no longer under their employ, which would be fine, but I do not sign my contract with Lewisville until the middle of July, so I am really and officially unemployed for a couple of weeks. I'm sure it will work out fine, but there is a little voice in the back of my head that is concerned that it will all fall apart and I will have to make some mad job search at the last moment.

Okay, I'm rambling. Have a good week (or so), guys.

Quick Test

2008-06-18T19:45:00.000-05:00

This won't be a real post, but I have to give some background to my comments. As most of you know, I recently resigned my job with the Irving ISD. Yup, next school year I will be a Fighting Farmer in the Lewisville ISD. The downside of this is that my computer was the property of my work, so I am sans technology (except for the hour or two after Jennifer comes home but before I go to bed). This has forced me to test the internet capabilities of my phone. So, I've written this entire post on my cell phone and it is time to see if it will work.

Introducing Two New Hylemons!

2008-06-02T10:05:00.013-05:00

Okay, I haven't posted in forever, and I am sorry for that. I have had a bad combination of too much to do and not enough to say. Not sure if that will be changing soon, but school is almost over, which should handle the busy-ness aspect of my problem.

Anyway, as most of you know, we got two new cats. Jericho is the black and white boy, and Kori is what Jennifer calls "tortoise shell" (she's the girl). They are both named after Teen Titans, one of the best comics in comic book history. I've tried to convince Jennifer that we need to rename Dutchess Kid Flash (which would be ironic because she is neither) and get four more cats to complete the set, but she is being stubborn on this one. Here are a bunch of random pictures of the cuties I have managed to amass.

And we still have Dutchess, who is as cute as always:

I may get in trouble for that last picture, but I think Dutch and Jennifer are both so cute in that picture!

Next time, more on the cats (including the story of why they are wearing collars), joining a gym (?!?), and I will talk about the joys of cooking class.

Dark Knight vs. The Batman

2008-05-05T15:16:00.005-05:00

See more funny videos at CollegeHumor

This is admittedly lazy, but I've got nothing else to post about (Still waiting to hear from you, LISD!), and this was interesting to me. On a related note, as a life long DC comics fan, I really should be able to get more excited about a DC comics movie, but I know right now that it will pale in comparison to most of Marvel's theatrical releases. Step up your game, Didio, and give us Booster Gold: The Movie!

Stress

2008-04-28T08:28:00.002-05:00

Don't get excited. I'm not back. By my count it has been almost a month since I posted. It isn't that there isn't anything to talk about, it's just that I can't find the words for all I'm thinking and feeling. The short version is that I'm stressed. Something in the back of my mind is telling me that this is par for the course this time of year. The TAKS crunch is always a cause for stress. Think of it as an annual performance review, except your review is dependent upon 130 bags of teenage hormones who haven't heard a word you have to say all year because the cute girl in the front row wears a skirt.

At the same time, I am facing pressures that I haven't in years past. For the first time ever, 8th graders have to pass the Math and Reading TAKS to move on to the 9th grade. What does that have to do with my Social Studies test? Well, as soon as you tell a kid that they must pass these two tests, all that they hear is that they don't have to pass the Social Studies test. I have been told at least ten times a day, every day this year, that my test doesn't matter and that my students have no intention of "stressing out" about my test. At the same time, the higher-ups are refusing to help us with any type of incentive program to motivate our kids, so my options are just at an end.

This is also the first TAKS season where I have the responsibilities that I do at VRCC. Calling people every Saturday to remind them of their roles in Sunday worship, only to then have to chase people down in our new big two-story church building on Sunday, is psychologically and physically taxing. Our grand opening yesterday was also a stressor, as it required me to prepare twice as much for communion, meaning I missed class and let my classmates down. I also missed most of worship to clean communion trays and get them out of the way so we could have our potluck. Then the pews had to be stacked and tables set up, which I'm obviously not physically strong enough to do without consequences. Add to that my social anxiety issues and a bunch of new people and I was emotionally overloaded by the end of the day. Dr. Wages did a great job, but I wasn't in a place to get anything out of it, so I left yesterday without spiritual feeding (my fault; not VRCC's.)

I have a job interview that I am just honestly torn on. It would involve taking a pay cut, but I would probably make that up in gas savings. I would likely have better kids, but I really like the administration that I'm working for now. I would be with my best friend in the whole world, but I would be teaching something that I'm not entirely comfortable with and am certainly not passionate about. Every time I think about this choice, I feel like my head is literally going to explode (I know what the word literal means, by the way, and I mean exactly what I write here).

I'm just so done. I am not sleeping well. My stomach has been tied in a knot for more than a week. My chest has hurt for the last three days straight. I feel like a well that is just empty. I've got nothing left to give, no reserves to draw from. I've got no compassion left, no sympathy. My temper with my kids is shot and I am raising my voice at them more often than I am comfortable with. The qualities that I like about myself have completely disappeared, and I long for the man that I used to see in the mirror.

I do this more than I should, but I need your prayers and forgiveness. I haven't been myself in a while, and I've probably hurt more than a few of you in my self-centeredness. I'm sorry, and I love you.

Something to Talk About

2008-03-31T19:05:00.003-05:00

Well, in response to Joanna's marching orders for the VRCC kitchen class, I thought it necessary to give y'all something to comment on, but first a couple of quick thoughts related to my weekend trip to Fredericksburg.

1. Cooper's Bar-B-Que rocks!- I learned this weekend that I am old. A relatively short (by Texas' standards) drive can wear me out. Our first night there, I slept more than twelve hours straight. Jennifer woke me up to tell me that the group was heading to Llano for BBQ. I nearly told her that I needed a few more hours of shut eye and "the group" could go without me, but I didn't want the conversation at lunch to be how lazy Jennifer's good-for-nothing husband was, so I pulled myself out of my coma and went to lunch. Man, am I thankful for social pressure! Cooper's is what Boi Na Braza would be if it were going for the "Dive" ambiance and sold its meat by the pound. It is apparently the preferred BBQ of Pres. Bush and, regardless of your political views, the man knows his Bar-B-Que. (Side Note: Shirt and Tie is never appropriate BBQ attire, even if you are Commander in Chief and you are having a photo op).

2. Fine, I surrender! (part two)- While in Fredericksburg, we discovered that all of Jennifer's friends were part of this whole Facebook thing. In the face of such formidible odds, Jen and I cracked and finally signed up. I can't tell you I get the whole thing yet, and I will probably offend some of my newfound "friends" since I have not yet learned the customs of this new and strange culture, but I'm here and trying.

Okay, the real point of the post, which would have been the thrust of my post even with out Joanna's upcoming lesson, has to do with a struggle I've been facing lately that you might help me work through. I am a big believer in "authentic Christianity". I think Church should be a place where we are who we really are, not the place where we put on our "happy Christian" faces and pretend that all of our struggles and problems evaporated off of us along with the baptism water. It is only by sharing our struggles with one another that we can hope to gain perspective on them and ultimately overcome them.

Recently, however, I have had several encounters with those who use this "authentic Christianity" as a pass on their sins. I've had someone tell me, "My church is great! They know all about my X (sin) and they think it's just fine!" I've seen that same attitude in others around me as well. It has become a theme the last few days. My question is: as great as authentic Christianity is, is there no room in it for a "transformative" Christianity; a faith that calls us to become better than we are?

Now don't get me wrong. I've seen first hand how destructive our faith can be when it is applied judgmentally; when the threat of "disfellowship" is used to make sure we lambs walk in lock step, and a moment of weakness is forever held against you. I am thankful that I found a place like VRCC that always errs on the side of love, but I'd like to think that if I dared call night day, or my sin righteousness, one of y'all would slap some sense into me!

It reminds me of the Romans passage, "Shall we continue sinning so that grace may abound?" Paul's answer on that is pretty clear. We don't take the grace that Christ died for and use it as an excuse to wallow in our wayward ways. We stumble; we fall, but we don't do so gleefully, and we certainly don't stay fallen , especially if there are those of the community of faith around us to pick us up.

It is one of the things that I treasure most about my dearest friends. They lead me closer to Christ. They encourage me to be better than I am. The lust, anger, arrogance, and the countless other sins in my life seem as pointless as they really are when I am in the midst of my Christian family.

I feel like I am rambling, which is probably a good sign that I need to wind this up. So, it's your turn: Can we find a balancing act between authentic Christianity and transformative faith?

Fine, I Surrender!!

2008-03-18T20:02:00.003-05:00

One of the things I have been most proud about with my blogging is that my blogs were a place where anyone could come and freely post their ideas. That was until the recent assault by Spammers.

In all honesty, I have never felt more violated than I have felt in the last couple of weeks when my email will notify me that someone has cared enough to post a message on my blog, only to discover that the message is nothing more than some opportunistic piece of human refuse trying to sell my loyal readers a sex product or force those same readers to download spyware. I'd like to think that I am a fairly accepting, even loving, individual, but for the life of me I don't understand how people that post things like that have the temerity to wake up in the morning and look at themselves in the morning. They are the very dregs of society, and it makes me indescribably unhappy that they breathe the same air as real human beings.

Okay, enough venting. The point of this post is to tell you that even though it saddens me deeply, I feel that I have no other choice but to activate all of the comment moderation features blogspot offers to prevent spammers. I will now have to approve all comments that are posted, and it also means the dreaded (by me at least) word verification system:

It is my hope that you can understand the need for these steps and that you will continue to visit and comment when you get a chance. Thanks, guys.

Exciting News!

2008-03-09T15:42:00.009-05:00

Well, okay, not so exciting for you, but I'm pumped about it. I think I've shared with you that in returning some of the extra gifts my mom gave us for the Christmas o' Plenty that I received a fairly sizable credit on my Amazon.com account. Jennifer and I used a good portion of that credit to buy a new printer. But not just a new printer, a LexMark WiFi Printer / Copier / Scanner. It is unequivocally the most hi tech thing I own that wasn't bought by the Irving Independent School District. Here is a picture of me trying out the scanner feature. As you can see, it is awesome!

In addition, after weeks of my whining, Jennifer found the USB cable for the digital camera, so I can start putting up new pictures on the ol' blog. Of course, now I have to take more pictures.

Oh, and apparently it snowed.

I't Me, It's Me, it's Paul-y B.

2008-03-03T19:03:00.004-06:00

I can't believe I only posted once in February! Hopefully March will be more productive, although I have low expectations of that being the case. As I've mentioned in my last two posts, I can't download pictures from my digital camera to my computer because I lost the USB cable that transmits that data (notice how I finally stopped calling it a dohicky?). Does anyone know if they make a replacement one of those, because I really don't want to have to buy a whole new camera. Anyway, it seems pointless to post without new pictures to post alongside.

For those interested in an update about the Renaissance Hotel, it was awesome; one of the best Valentine's ever (comparable to the time Jennifer bought me Resident Evil 2 when we were dating). We did have a view of the Dallas skyline, which was breath taking, while the Cheese/Fruit and Cookie/Milk trays were delicious. T Bones also would have been awesome, except I was really full of fruit, cheese, and cookies before we ever got there. We should have thought that one through a little better.

I'm a little light on material to post about, but here is the short hand version:

1. New Church Building- We are up and running at the new Church building. There is a learning curve with the new place (I can't quite get a handle on how to administer communion and gather servers), but with familiar faces in the pew, it is starting to feel like home.

2. Odd students- I have had two different issues with student oddness in the last few days that mystify me. The first was when I had students come up to the board and demonstrate how to work a problem (which was basically me asking leading questions until they got to the right answer). It was a grade, and a virtual guaranteed 100 if the students tried, but I had one girl that absolutely refused. Even when I threatened a zero, a detention, and a much more difficult and boring alternative assignment, she still refused to take the easy 100. I get that to some degree, because public speaking can be a big fear, but it was an easy grade, so now I have this assignment with 119 students getting a 100 and one student with a zero. The second example of oddness was more perplexing. We were correcting a test, which involves me pairing the class based off score (highest scorer with lowest scorer, next highest with next lowest, etc.). Again, I had one girl (a different one from the first) who just refused to work with the student she was paired with. Now I teach Middle School, so I'm used to drama, so I assumed that there was some story behind her refusal to join her partner. Nope! According to her, she just doesn't "talk to him" because they don't "know" each other. Again, I tried to explain to her that her grade was dependent on her working with her partner, that there would be negative consequences if she refused to work, and even acted out how civilized people begin conversations with people they don't "know", but she insisted that it felt "weird" to ask her partner what he got as an answer to number 1. She chose to fail instead of working with someone she didn't "know". Now, y'all know that I'm not the social butterfly, but this easily had two of the three rules involved.

3. Depression- I don't know what is going on, but I've been battling the blues on and off for more than a week. It hasn't been constant, and I have had more than a few "up" days, but I've had just about as many "down" days. I'm feeling very incompetent, like I can't say or do the right thing. So, if you noticed me being off the last little while, that's why. Pray for me as I try to shake this.

Anyway, you are always in my prayers.

Jennifer's a Romantic!

2008-02-11T20:08:00.000-06:00

I might not say this often enough in this forum, but I love my wife Jennifer deeply. Despite this deep and abiding love, Valentine's day is one of those days that I live in dread of. Not that I think that I can't find romantic gifts to express my love, only that Jennifer's not going to care no matter how extravagant my expressions of love. You see, by her own admission, Jennifer doesn't have a romantic bone in her body. As an example of this, when I asked Jennifer what she wanted for Valentine's Day, she decided after considerable thought that she needed a new pair of jeans. Now, I am not qualified to discuss the special bond a woman can form with a good pair of denim, but roses and chocolate it ain't.

Despite this, Jennifer has done a remarkable job in formulating her Valentine's plan for me. Behold the Renaissance Hotel, where Jennifer and I will have a fancy suite in the lap of luxury.The suite includes a tray of fruit and crackers as well as milk and fresh made cookies (which isn't so much romantic, but it sounds delicious). I'm hoping that I will find the connecter dohicky that allows me to download digital pictures to my laptop, but until then, enjoy these pictures I stole from the Renaissance Hotel website.

The website claims that every room has a view of the Dallas skyline, which I don't think is possible, but what do I know?

One of the many ammenities boasted by the hotel is a rooftop pool, which I seriously doubt we will be taking advantage of in the middle of February, but I'm packing my swin suit just in case.

T Bones is the fancy resturant in the hotel that we will be eating at. Yeah, like I was really going to have a special occasion and not talk about the food.

A picture of a random room that may or may not be similar to what we will have. Pretty impressive.

Anyway, the point of the post is just to say that my wife rocks and I am very lucky.

Pointless Post No. Whatever

2008-01-25T13:15:00.000-06:00

I should update, but I have less than nothing to say. So, instead of putting monumental effort into what will ultimately be a sub-par post, here are some quick and random thoughts.

1. My students are whining, and I'm frustrated because I want to whine to. I feel lousy again (so tired of battling sickness). I have a Doctor's appointment this afternoon because of my lovely wife's insistence, which I am thankful for because I will feel better, but hate because it makes me feel like I'm giving up my man card.

2. Nothing is worse than a day when school is almost called off by weather. My classes are seeing about 60% attendance even though there was absolutely nothing wrong with the streets this morning.

3. I'm really tired of stealing copyrighted images of the web, but I lost the dohicky that connects my digital camera to my laptop, so all I have are ancient pictures like these:

4. The last picture makes me remember that I have been having really vivid dreams about Booger lately. In these dreams I'm trying to catch him (sometimes to give him medicine, sometimes just to keep him safe). I can never quite get to him and he just disappears. I'm really wanting to get a new cat, maybe because I miss the companionship (Duchess hates me), maybe because I think it will exorcise me of these dreams. Last night, we learned that Jennifer and I are going to hit a roadblock when it comes to cat names because she has some weird issue with the number of syllables in a pets name (and she refuses to let me name it "Booster Gold the Cat".

5. I really want to see Cloverfield, and everyone I know apparently wants to see Cloverfield, but scheduling a night to watch Cloverfield seems like an impossibility. Maybe I can convince LaRae to use her newfound position to schedule another movie night.

Taking off our Masks

2008-01-15T08:48:00.000-06:00

"Is there anyone that fails? Is there anyone that falls? Am I the only one in church today feelin' so small? 'Cause when I take a look around, everybody seems so strong. I know they'll soon discover that I don't belong. So I tuck it all away, like everything's okay. If I make them all believe it, maybe I'll believe it too. So with a painted grin, I play the part again, so everyone will see me the way that I see them."

- Casting Crowns "Stained Glass Masquerade"

Last week saw great discussion about politics, so if I were smart I would milk that with another political topic. Apparently, I'm not that smart, because I'm a little burned out on politics at the moment (even though the Michigan Primary is tonight). Instead, I'm in a bit of a theologically reflective mood, so that's what you get today.

One of the gifts that I got in my Christmas O' Plenty was the very good CD from Casting Crown, Lifesong. The above quote really resonates with me, largely because it is one of the three or four points that I always preach on when given an opportunity. I've said many times how difficult the church experience was for me growing up, largely because I lived in a not so perfect family and all I saw on Sunday morning were the shiny, happy people. As a result, I quickly learned that church was not the place for honest or heartfelt revelation. There was a disconnect between what was preached and what was lived.

It wasn't until college that I learned that this wasn't a necessary disconnect; that the way of Christ leads through the Garden of Gethsemane and not through the rose garden; that it was acceptable to pray (even publicly) for something more intimate than your great aunt's sinus infection. The Church of Christ isn't the clubhouse of the perfect, it is the haven for those of us who have been smashed against the rocks of life and find themselves all too often overwhelmed by the floods of our own making. Since learning this lesson, I have tried to live an authentic Christian life, acknowledging my fallenness and seeking the strength that comes from God and his Church to overcome my sin. Every day I struggle with one undeniable reality: I am not yet who I long to be, and I will never be until I am united with Christ.

As I hear the above quoted song, however, I am made to wonder if I carry on this struggle too quietly. Does my flurry of "service" on Sunday mornings, my occasionally well polished words, make people think I couldn't relate to their struggles, that the application process to my faith requires a perfect life. I'm not one of the happy, shiny people, and if I have led any of you to think I am, that I have it all together, I apologize to you.

A related point and a question: It is odd and seems fairly egotistical to think about how others see you, but I find myself asking that question often as of late. What sort of face do I show the world? How do I want people to see me? I don't want to be seen as the perfect person; the great spiritual leader. My feet are made of clay too fragile, and we have only one spirutal leader. I guess more than anything else, I want to be seen as someone who loves deeply and unhesitatingly. I know I have made more than a few of you uncomfortable by telling you that I love you, but I have resolved that with as many people as there are in the world who stumble through their lives feeling unloved and unlovable that I would not waste one opportunity to let someone know that they are cared about. I'd also like to be seen as someone who is loyal and dependable. I would like to think that if you needed something that you wouldn't hesitate to call me because you would know that I would drop everything for your sake. I would like to think that I am someone who can be counted on.

I'm not sure if I've acheived showing either of these traits to the world, but it is what I strive towards (remember that I am not yet who I long to be). How do you want the world to see you?

Math is Hard!

2008-01-08T17:44:00.001-06:00

I have been plaqued by serious writer's block the last few weeks, thus the lack of posts. It isn't so much that I haven't had anything to say, since I should follow up on my Christmas O' Plenty, and I'm really dying to solicit feelings on the political primary season, but I just can't think of any way to make either of those topics interesting to anyone, even me. Just as I was about to doubt the future of this blog, my students gave me this ammunition (I swear all of this was said with deathly seriousness):

Me: You have 60 seconds to finish this assignment.

Polly (The names are changed to protect the goofy): Mister, isn't 60 seconds a minute?

Me: Yup.

Mark: Nu-Uh! I thought a minute was 100 seconds.

Me: Uh, Nope.

Brenda (Who really is usually smart): No, Stupid. A minute is 60 seconds. 100 seconds is 90 seconds.

Me: What? *Stifled Laughter*

Brenda: No, I mean 100 seconds is a minute and a half. *Big Confident Smile*

Me: Darn, our minute is up. Go ahead and turn your work in (and stop sleeping in math class!).

Holiday Hoopla

2007-12-23T02:54:00.000-06:00

As I type this, it is 3am and I am sitting in a Holiday Inn Express in Meridian, Mississippi that has the hardest bed known to man. Since that bed, and the aches and pains that come from driving halfway across the country, have induced insomnia in me, I thought I would be productive and respond to EDMC's request for holiday facts about me. So, here you go:

1. Apparently I have only one Christmas picture saved on my computer, which is why you get to see this picture for the second time in as many weeks.

2. As a kid, I was spoiled rotten, and Christmas was no exception. I have a very distinct memory of one Christmas waking up and being unable to get in the living room because it was lined wall to wall with presents (Don't worry, I have a brother and a sister, so I only got a third of a room of presents).

3. Somewhere in time that all changed and my family became money givers. In my teenaged years, family Christmas involved a big tree with dozens of envelopes under it in place of the brightly colored packages.

4. To this day, my all time favorite Christmas present is the Transformer Megatron. He was the one that transformed into a gun, and looked really real. Why don't we give kids great toys like this anymore.

5. My maternal grandmother's birthday was Christmas day. To that end, we always opened our extended family's presents at Grandma's house on Christmas eve, and then went back there during the afternoon of Christmas day to "celebrate" her birthday. I'm ashamed of how many times I resisted going and, failing that argument, retreated into a book or portable video game instead of letting that special woman know how important she was.

6. I once played Santa Claus in my High School Choir's Christmas Concert. Yup, I was always the fat kid, but it came in handy on this occasion.

7. My mother is the all time best decorator of Christmas trees. I don't know if it the result of a lifetime of collecting Christmas ornaments or one year of blowing the entire Christmas budget (knowing her I suspect the latter) but she has roughly 3,436 Christmas ornaments, and she somehow puts them all on the tree. It is this eclectic hodge podge of stuff and is probably the most garish thing you've ever seen, but it has always been the most beautiful tree to me (you'd think I would have a picture of it somewhere).

8. I am a fanatical proponent of artificial trees. Growing up, my family had this incredibly unique tree topper, a twirling multi-colored star that I would spend hours staring at. Every Christmas I would tell my parents that when they died that tree topper was the only inheritance I wanted (I was a morbid kid as well as being the fat kid). One year, my parents decided to shake things up and get a real tree instead of putting up their artifical one. Two days later, that real tree tipped over and shattered the tree topper. In the 20 years since, I have never found a replacement for it (not even at Christmas Town in Mobile, Alabama). Nature and I have been mortal enemies ever since.

9. Although there are parts of Christmas that I really enjoy (no school, anyone?), I detest the secretiveness of it all. The hushed conversations that suddenly stop when you approach, the talking in code, the not knowing what room you can enter and when; it all makes me feel like I'm the butt of some cruel joke, even though intentions are as pure as can be. Amazon.com is fantastic because I can check to see what items have been purchased for me and open my presents on Christmas morning without the trepidation that comes with the unknown (this year I am getting a portable hard drive, Buffy the Chosen Collection, and a gift certificate to Lone Star Comics).

10. Christmas is also difficult for me because it reminds me of how materialistic I am. Maybe it is a by-product of the rooms full of Christmas presents as a kid, but I can't seem to talk about this holiday without couching it in terms of what I am going to get. I wish it was a more spiritual event for me; that I could talk about it as the birth of Christ (although Biblical scholars say it probably isn't), or failing that, that I could be the generous person who lives up to the adage, "it is better to give than to receive," but deep down, I'm still spoiled rotten.

11. My parents were geniuses when it came to getting us to go to bed Christmas eve, or at least they thought so. After opening our extended family presents at our Grandma's house on Christmas eve, mom and dad would drive around neighborhoods looking at Christmas lights until our adrenaline levels subsided and we would trudge off to bed and sleep heavily. At some point, though, this failed to work on me (probably because I had consumed five pieces of Pumpkin pie). I stayed up virtually the whole night watching the Catholic Mass from St. Peters Basilica, which was the only thing on any of the three channels I got in my room (thank God for Cable), and listening to Santa swear up a storm as he tried to put my sister's bicycle together.

12. I've only got one more, huh? I could say that It's a Wonderful Life is one of the greatest movies ever and that I am a little sad that they released it in VCR form, thereby removing it from it's special place as a holiday tradition. As a matter of fact, that movie has really lost its special place in American culture as a whole over the last decade (darn Cable TV!), but all of that is kind of obvious and I'm in more of a sharing mood. Growing up, Christmas eve night was the only night of the year where I slept in a bed. My brother is adopted and is actually my cousin (it's a long story). Steven came to live with us when he and I were both five years old (I'm ten months older), and this was my first experience in learning that it is difficult to share a room with another person. Steven liked it hot and I wanted it cold. I wanted the TV on and Steven needed it off. Steven snored and I, well, probably did as well but he fell asleep more quickly. Almost immediately after Steven came to live with us, I would sneak out of bed and go sleep on the couch. After a while, the sneaking part became pointless, since mom woke me up in the morning, and it was just established that Paul slept in the living room. Christmas Eve was the only night I had to share a room with Steven, and those sleeping differences, combined with Pumpkin pie and Christmas morning anticipation made for a lot of Holiday induced insomnia.

And so we come full circle. It's 4 am, and I have no clue what to do until Jennifer wakes up, but I hope you all have a very merry Christmas, and sound sleep with visions of sugar plums dancing in your head.

The Digital Holiday Season

2007-12-17T15:10:00.000-06:00

Before you get too excited, the picture is from years ago. To be honest, I'm not sure where our Christmas Tree is, and we wouldn't be putting it up even if we could, because we will be traveling once again this year. There is nothing more laborious than spending the effort and time to put up a tree, only to be gone on the only day it matters, and then to have to return home only to be faced with the chore of taking the tree down. So I'm hum-bugging it this season.

What is not hum-buggary, however, is the wonders of the internet. Last Saturday I did my portion of the Christmas shopping, all within a two hour timeframe, and all sitting in my pee-jays. A couple of things to try if you are sick of fighting traffic and rude people at the malls:

http://www.amazon.com/ - Is there anyone who doesn't know how wonderful this sight is? Apparently so, since so few of you have Amazon.com wish lists. I haven't truly researched this, but I believe that there isn't anything this site doesn't sell. Best of all for those of us who are kind of lazy, they gift wrap and allow you to include personal messages in your shipments, and they will mail your present straight to the recipient, which keeps you from waiting at the Post Office.

hallmark.com- This may prove the height of my laziness, but hallmarks website has a feature where you can purchase an individual card and a hallmark employee will hand write a message for you. Again, they will put the stamp on the envelope and put it in the mail for you. You even get to choose which stamp!

http://www.williams-sonoma.com/ and http://www.dillards.com/ are only a pair of the websites that you can order from online and they will ship it straight to your loved one. They also let you buy giftcards, in case you don't have a clue what your loved one would like.

There is some overly nostalgic part of me that wants to decry the impact of the information age on this sacred holiday, but when you can let your family and friends know that they are loved and still keep your bottom comfy on the couch and out of the cold, who could complain?

Merry Christmas, guys! I will be out of touch for a few weeks, so don't hold your breath for updates.

Has it been a week already?

2007-12-06T08:44:00.000-06:00

I can honestly say that I have absolutely nothing of value to post this week. My father-in-law sent this to me, however, and I thought it was kind of funny.

If you can't read it, it's about a gun-toting grandma that stopped some kids from stealing her car, only to figure out that it wasn't really her car and that she was the car-jacker. It reminds me of my child hood, when my aunt once spent thirty minutes trying to get her key to open her car door before figuring out that the car wasn't hers.

Mondo Update

2007-11-27T18:09:00.000-06:00

First things first, let me apologize for my unannounced hiatus last week. It wasn't planned, but it is amazing how a week off can make one's week very full. Okay, I have a ton of observations and comments to make, so let's get right to it.

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An Informal Taste Test

I'm not sure if you've discovered it for yourself, but McDonald's has recently begun selling their new "Southern Style Chicken Sandwich", which is essentially their take on the classic Chik-Fil-A Chicken Sandwich. I was amused by Micky D's nerve in out and out copying the more famous sandwich, but I was also pleasantly surprised in how good the imitator was. To determine just how good it was, as well as to fill up some of my "free time" during the break, I subjected Jennifer to a blind taste test.

I used five categories in our evaluation, although two of these (price and size of sandwich) were objective. For the record, price goes to the McDonald's, but only by five cents, but Chick-Fil-A gets the nod on size, again only by a little. The other three categories were taste of chicken, taste of bun, and overall taste. Also for the record, I took the taste test as well, and McDonald's version won all three categories for me. Jennifer's results were as follows:

Chicken: Chik-Fil-A ("it tasts more like a chicken breast than a chicken patty.")
Bun: McDonald's ("Chik-Fil-A's is butterier, but McDonald's has a 'consistency of flavor'.")

Overall: Chik-Fil-A ("McDonald's tastes more like a sandwich, but Chik-Fil-A tastes like a CHICKEN sandwich.")

Okay, so that is probably as clear as mud, but the short version is that McDonald's new "Southern Style" Chicken Sandwich is at least almost as good as the original Chik-Fil-A sandwich, and you can get it on Sundays, so give it a shot if you get a chance.

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A Vacation Observation

It doesn't matter how relaxing or restful a break is, when the alarm clock goes off at 5:30am the first day back, it is impossible to not wish for one more day off.

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The Mist

Jennifer and I watched the movie adaptation of Stephen King's The Mist, and I have to say that it was really exceptional. It's still a little early to talk about my favorite movie of 2007, but this is definitely at the front of the pack currently. In the interest of full disclosure, the gore factor is fairly high (although not unusually high for a Horror movie) and there are some language issues, but the movie is haunting in the best use of that word. It is intelligent and provacative, and will leave you thinking about it long after it is over.

Side note. As we were watching the closing credits, we were witness to the manager chewing out the wait staff of our local Sudio Movie Grill. The reason I found this so amusing was that the theme of the "chewing" was how unprofessional the wait staff was. Now, several times during the incident the manager looked over and noticed that two paying customers were still sitting in the theater, yet continued to berate his employees for their lack of professionalism. There is nothing quite like being unprofessional as you critique others on their unprofessionalism.

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MEME (whatever that means)

EDMC tagged me and told me I had to make an acronym out of my middle name with words that describe me. So here goes:

Brooding- Probably not using that word correctly, but I am highly introspective (which could have been my "i" I guess). I'm probably known best as a speaker, either in the pulpit or the classroom, but I tend to be much more reflective and thoughtful than I am sometimes given credit for.

Republican- It's been a while since I've gone into full-tilt annoying conservative mode, but it's virtually an election year, and with KLTY playing Christmas music, I've been listening to alot of Talk Radio.

Inventive- One of the things I'm coming to understand about myself (especially in comparison to some of my students) is that I'm a problem solver. When faced with a complication, whether it is a flat tire or an unresponsive computer, I am capable of coming up with the most ludicrous of out-of-the-box solutions.

Articulate- Me knows lots of big words.

Nerd- I'll steal Joanna's "N". It kind of goes without saying that I'm a comic book geek, but my particular form of nerdiness is special. Reading comics is great, but it doesn't quite match up to the thrill of learning some obscure factoid about a comic universe. Things like the Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe and Who's Who in the DC Universe are like my drug.

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Okay, I've written more than anybody ever should, so I'm done.

Coming Next, the Southern Baptist Submarine

2007-11-12T13:56:00.000-06:00

So, there was nothing interesting to blog about other than my desperate desire to be gone for Thanksgiving, my students even more ardent desire for same (and subsequent poor behavior), and the fact that VRCC actually closed on the new building (I got keys yesterday), but none of these seem particularly blog worthy. Then I went to Fox News and found the following:

Car Company Considers Vehicle Exclusively for Muslims

A national automaker is considering an Iranian proposal to design a car exclusively for Muslims, CNSNEWS.com reported Monday.

Among the features on the proposed vehicle are compasses that point toward Mecca and compartments for the Koran and prayer scarves, CNSNEWS.com reported. Proton, a Malaysia-based car maker, may agree to develop the “Islamic Car.”

“The car will have all the Islamic features and should be meant for export purposes,” Zainal Abidin Syed Mohamed Tahir told the Malaysian Bernama news agency, adding that with government support, the producers could expect a large volume of orders.

So I'm torn between the decidedly un-PC comment about this Muslim Car having a special place for terrorists to hide their bombs and my very real desire to buy this car just to put my Bible in the compartment reserved for the Koran and Pork Chops in the place the Prayer Scarves will go. Take your pick.

The "Fight"

2007-11-05T20:03:00.000-06:00

It's funny how procrastination can work in your favor. I should have blogged about my physical confrontation with a student last week, but I postponed it until this week. Now, many of you will have the context of my pitiable performance at VRCC's "Turkey Bowl" flag football game to back up my story. Long story short, I am somewhat less than graceful. This served me poorly a week or so ago when a student decided that he just had to get into a fight right in front of my classroom door about five minutes before first period started. I stepped in between the student and his intended victim to encourage him to get to class, but he was not disuaded. He continued to verbally challenge the other student, so I started to "herd" him towards the office. Suddenly, he decided to charge towards the (much smaller) student that he had a problem with and I stepped in his way a second time. This time he shoved into me hard and tried to move me out of his way. I stood my ground, but as was demonstrated on Sunday, it is difficult to get my girth to change direction once I get my momentum going. Long story short, he side stepped me, and I tripped and fell. Somewhere in the melee, I earned the war wounds you see in the picture above.

Alright, now here is where my ego is getting the better of me. I was on the ground no longer than two seconds. I immediately got up, confronted the student again, and successfully restrained him until the principal arrived to escort the student to the office. Almost immediately, however, the story spread how "Mr. Hylemon was dropped" by a student. Now, in all honesty I could care less what a bunch of kids think of my fighting prowess (like this is really a measure of my worth as a man or a teacher), but I became more troubled throughout the day and since the incident by the number of my co-workers who were not present for the event coming to me and asking me with deathly seriousness, "Are you okay?" and sympathizing with me how "wild" the kids are this year. It seems somehow overly defensive to protest that the situation was overblown, that I was a victim of my own clumsiness and not of an ill behaved child, so I let the comments go, but that feels just as wrong, as it's only adding credence to the erroneously reported version of events.

So, that is the story of my first big school "fight" and the resulting fallout. To be honest with you, I'm kind of over it now and I only mentioned it because I promised to do so. Next week I'll have something more entertaining.

Happy Halloween, whether you like it or not!

2007-10-31T08:39:00.000-05:00

My first instinct was to blog about the physical confrontation that I had with a student last week, but I delayed long enough until it was Halloween, so I figure a holiday post is more in order (I'll talk about my brawl next week, I promise).

Anyway, today's post is spurred on by my morning commute, which is always accompanied by the calming tones of KLTY's morning show with Frank Reed, Darlene Stringer, and Perry Revis. It dawned on me very early in my commute that these three were trying very hard to not even use the word "Halloween"(although in fairness Frank would use the expression, "Halloween alternative" on occasion). The code word that was most often used was "Fall Festival", as in, "The weather is going to be wonderful for your little ones as they go out to Fall Festivals tonight." I've always thought of myself as a Christian in good standing (actually that is a lie. I've always seen myself as a Christian darn lucky to have a forgiving God), but I missed the memo where it became the standard assumption that all good Christians eschew Halloween entirely.

I know that this is a source of conflict among some of us, but I think that friendship is only real if we can disagree with one another and still love each other, so let's talk about this. I come from the camp that says, at worst, Halloween is a meaningless night that allows kids to dress up, have some fun, and get candy. At best, it is a national tradition that unites disparate people in a common cultural legacy that forges an American identity that values shared rituals over sectarian heritage. In short, Halloween makes a stronger united America.

One could argue that the use of costume is not so much about idolizing the assumed identity, but casting off the real identity. We mask who we are to show that what we are is nothing. If everyone is something weird, than there is no standard for conformity; no majority or minority. We must all be accepted (or rejected) based off of our own uniqueness instead of on our allegience to certain socio-racial subgroups.

Unfortunately, this is all a national and philosophical perspective rather than a religious one, which is my supposed area of expertiese. Of course, I'm Church of Christ, and we CoC'ers speak where the Bible speaks and are silent where the Bible is silent, and the Bible is pretty silent on Halloween. I did find an interesting Episcopalian article here that makes sense to me from the Christian Point of View. Read it and give me your thoughts.

I love you guys, and I hope you have a Happy "Fall Festival" today.

Coming Home?

2007-10-22T14:53:00.000-05:00

Well, as you should be able to tell, I fell off the wagon last week and didn't get to blog. I can't tell you how much I loathe working with the laptop carts at school, because it takes 10 minutes to pass them out and 10 minutes to collect them, and then I have to stand at constant attention of what the kids are doing for fear they will "accidentally" wind up on a porn site. It really cuts into my slacking time.

Anyway, Jennifer and I spent the weekend in lovely downtown Abilene, Texas for ACU's homecoming. I learned a couple of things from this experience:

1) Only the pretty and perfect people come to homecoming reunions. As I reflect on my time at ACU, I had more than a few friends. This weekend, I saw exactly three of them, and that is only because they still live in Abilene. The rest of them had better things to do than spend a weekend trying to recapture past glory. The cynic in me says that the only people who go to reunions are those whose lives peaked during college, but that is probably unfair.

2) Jennifer apparently had more "pretty and perfect" friends than I did in college. In what will surprise you not at all, Jennifer is more social than I am, and the whole weekend thusly consisted of me standing awkwardly behind her as she hugged and chit-chatted with people that I could not pick out of a line up to save my life.

3) I have really good current friends. There were exactly two times this weekend when I got excited upon recognizing someone. Both happened during the homecoming chapel. The first time was when I saw the Thompsons (Cody, Robyn, and Jace) from VRCC. The second time was when the Wages came in a little later. Also, we met up with the Hamptons who showed us around campus (it's changed a bunch in the last 7 years) and let me hold their cat. Seeing old familar faces is nice, but it is hard to beat those reminders of home.

4) Despite all of this, some friends are real keepers. My friends the Bells (Don and Melissa) housed us for the weekend and showed Jennifer and I that we really suck as hosts. The Emery's shared lunch with us Sunday, and there was some real nourishing of that relationship that I hope doesn't end at Carino's.

I hope that my comments don't offend anyone, particularly Wages', Thompsons', or any of Jennifer's friends whose names I learned this weekend but immediately forgot.

Is it Christmas Yet?

2007-10-08T12:15:00.000-05:00

As many of you know, school is out today for Columbus day (or "fair day" in some districts). It's nice to have a day off, but it feels very abreviated. This year hasn't been the hardest one I've had in teaching, but I'm looking forward to a nice extended break.

If you hadn't guessed, I have little to say today. Jennifer and I are trying to clear out stuff on our DVR, so it's a relaxing day on the couch. I have work I should do for work tomorrow, but I can't bring myself to make it happen.

I'm not going to make you read my pointless ramblings, so I will sign off. Take care.

Random Entertainment Notes

2007-09-30T13:35:00.000-05:00

In advance, sorry EDMC for the lack of pictures. Anyway, Fall is here, and with the change in the season (at least the change going on everywhere but in Texas), we get new television shows! Yesterday, Jennifer and I got to sit and watch a good number of these new shows, so I thought I would give a couple of quick reviews. For the record, a couple of new shows that I'm interested in have not yet aired, so I will have to save those reviews for a future blog.

Chuck- Chuck is an example of a couple of current trends that I'm enjoying. The first is the whole concept of the average person put into extraordinary circumstances (Here, a computer nerd accidentally views a top secret email and must become a super spy). The second is a real blurring of genres (Chuck blends action and comedy far more seamlessly than I've ever seen it done in previous years). The final trend is the recognition that we nerds watch a lot of television and should be television producers target audience. This is a show I really enjoyed.

K-Ville- This is one of those standard procedural dramas, but it is set in a post-Katrina New Orleans, which adds a degree of tension that makes the show more watchable. It loses some points because Anthony Anderson, the main character who is supposedly a life long New Orleans resident, can't seem to summon a Cajun accent, but all in all the show is enjoyable.

Big Bang Theory- This is the other show about nerds, and one of the only new standard style sitcoms this season. Since it deals with science and math geeks, alot of it is going over my head, but Jennifer is still laughing, so it must be good.

Journeyman- This is the show that keeperofbooks34 compared to Quantum Leap a while back, and I have to admit that in concept it is a fair comparison. Still, this show is slick and clever, with those open ended questions that make shows like Lost and Heroes worth watching. Perhaps more than any other new show (with the exception of Pushing Daisies), this is the one that I'm rooting for. Of course that means it is the most likely to be cancelled first.

Reaper- Again, this was one of those quirky shows I enjoyed and will therefore probably lose. Sam learns that his parents sold his soul to the devil and he must now become Satan's bounty hunter (think Ghost Rider). This was another show that blurred the lines between comedy and drama, and did so well. It was alot like Buffy the Vampire Slayer, which makes sense since Joss Whedon directed the pilot. I hope it works as well with other directors.

Bionic Woman- Perhaps the most overrated show this year, the first episode didn't live up to the hype in my opinion. Still, Jennifer liked it and I'm willing to give it a few more viewings.

Life- As an established fact, procedural crime shows with quirky detectives don't tend to do well (with the exception of the originator of the genre Monk), but I really enjoyed Life. Part of the series is shot in a documentary style, which gives the show a different feel as well as allowing an easy plot device for exposition. This one is definitely worth a view.

Moonlight- Jennifer is correct when she says that Angel did this concept better, but if you are hungry for a vampire as private detective story, this fills the need pretty well. Plus, it features Logan Echolls from Veronica Mars as a 900 year old Vampire.

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I wanted to give you a sense of exactly how much television we watch, so as a special bonus, here is what my DVR is set to record this week:

Monday

7:00-8:00
Prison Break (FOX)
Chuck (NBC)
How I Met Your Mother / The Big Bang Theory (CBS)

8:00-9:00
K-Ville (FOX)
Heroes (NBC)
Two and a Half Men / Rules of Engagement (CBS)

9:00-10:00
Journeyman (NBC)

Tuesday

7:00-8:00
Bones (FOX)
Carpoolers (ABC)

8:00-9:00
House (FOX)
Reaper (CW)
Eureka (Sci-Fi)

9:00-10:00
ECW (Sci-Fi)

Wednesday

7:00-8:00
Back to You / 'Til Death (FOX)
Pushing Daisies (ABC)
Kid Nation (CBS)

8:00-9:00
Bionic Woman (NBC)
Private Practice (ABC)

9:00-10:00
Life (NBC)

Thursday

7:00-8:00
Are you Smarter than a 5th Grader (FOX)
My Name is Earl / 30 Rock (NBC)
Survivor: China (CBS)

8:00-9:00
Don't Forget the Lyrics! (FOX)
The Office (NBC)
CSI (CBS)

9:00-10:00
Big Shots (ABC)

10:00-11:00
Smallville (The West Coast Feed of the CW)

11:00-12:00
Supernatural (The West Coast Feed of the CW)

Friday

7:00-8:00
Are you Smarter than a 5th Grader (FOX)
WWE Smackdown (CW)

8:00-9:00
Moonlight (CBS)

9:00-10:00
Numb3rs (CBS)

Saturday

8:00-9:00
Solitary 2.0 (FOX Reality)

10:00-12:00
TNA Impact (Spike TV)

Sunday

7:00-9:00
FOX Animation Block (FOX)

9:00-10:00
Shark (CBS)

In addition, I have to watch WWE Raw in a back bedroom and Jennifer watches Grey's Anatomy on-line because we are already taping too many other things when those shows air. So you understand why we might be a little busy.

R.I.P.

2007-09-25T08:43:00.001-05:00

Yeah, it's going to be that kind of post. As most of you know by now, I came home from work one week ago today and found that Booger had passed away. All I can think is that I am this big guy; I've literally moved a couch by myself, and an eerily still ball of fur can break me down in ways that I could never imagine and can't easily get past.

The loss of a pet is an interesting thing. You can't really take time to grieve, because no job has a policy on how many days you get off for the death of your animal (Does it even count as a death in the family?), and it may just be me, but it feels odd to ask for prayers like you would if your grandmother died (although in truth I was closer to Booger than I was with any of my grand parents).

I've realized one thing through this experience, however. I'm ruining a communion thought here (I'm sorry for those of you who will here this again in a couple of weeks), but that Wednesday after Booger died was so hard. No one at my work cared; my students actually laughed when I told them about my loss. I didn't bother telling people at the comic book shop. It was only when I got to church that night that I could really express my grief. It is only at church where there were people who would mourn with me (regardless of their personal feelings about Booger in particular or cats in general). I think so often we come to church and we try to leave all of our cares at the door and put on our happy faces, but what I have realized is that church is the only place where we can come with all of our baggage, all of our pain, all of our sin, and find people who will share the burden and a God who will give us strength and healing.

Thank you guys for being there for me. I love you.

Quick Update

2007-09-11T16:01:00.000-05:00

Because some of you, like EDMC, just can't wait to learn about my life, here is a quick update.

1) Tonight is Meet the Teacher night, which I loathe. Is it possible that everyone will stay home to honor the memory of those who died six year ago?

2) My room is beyond frigid. I don't normally complain about being chilly, but I'm growing icicles on my nose here.

3) Networked printers are awesome. Yesterday I was running late to work, and needed to make copies before my morning duty at 7:45. Instead of coming to my room, turning on my computer, waiting for it to boot, pressing print, waiting for the printer to warm up, and then going to make copies, I was able to turn my computer on during the commute and hit the print button as soon as I saw the IISD wireless connection, (which was as I was stopped by the crossing guard before I even pulled into the parking lot), and have my paper waiting for me on my printer as I walked into the room. It saved me 10 minutes.

Love you guys!

Two Birds, One Post

2007-09-04T15:33:00.000-05:00

So I have two problems. 1) Either there isn't enough going on in my life right now to give you a good blog entry or, more likely, there is too much going on to organize my thoughts into a coherent blog entry (funny how those two things can feel the same) and 2) I am plagued by Joanna's requirement that good blog entries have photos, and I haven't dragged out my camera in a while so all of my pictures are old. In order to get a blog entry, therefore, you are going to have to sit through a bunch of older pictures as I explain what you see, even though it has nothing to do with my life right now.

The first picture requires very little explanation. This is me goofing around with the cats. This picture always makes me laugh, not just because I have the cheesiest smile on my face of all time, but because you can imagine the conversation the cats are having as they stare at each other wondering what the heck the weird fat guy is doing. As a matter of fact, let's make it a contest. Whoever writes the funniest conversation in the comments sectionwill get credit in the next post. By the way, since this appears to be a constant source of confusion, Duchess is in my right arm and Booger is in the left. Seriously, guys, I don't get your kids confused, you could at least remember which of my cats is which.

The next picture is the only one I have on my computer from my wedding. Now, I'm quite confident that somewhere in my house is a big oversized album just chock full of pictures, but this is the only one that I have on my hard drive. A couple of comments here, the big blob of light is my camera's flash, because instead of using some fancy scanner I was lazy and just snapped a digital picture of a paper picture. Worse yet, I snapped a digital picture of a paper picture while the paper picture was still in its glass frame. It's kind of scary thinking about all the people at work that come to me to solve their computer issues when I look at the brillant solutions I've devised like this one. Secondly, the man in the picture with me is my father. Those of you who know me well know that I don't talk alot about my family. Alot of that is because I'm a largely self-focused individual who lives in the moment and doesn't reflect on the past, and part of it is that my parents went through a bitter divorce shortly after I got out of college and I'm not yet in a place to deal with it myself. Be that as it may, my father is just about the greatest man I've ever known, someone I aspire to be like, and someone I am thankful to have as a part of my life.

And on a lighter note, here is a picture of me eating pizza in North Carolina. This is from the now infamous Nags Head vacation. I'm sure I shared the story that our plane left DFW at what I affectionately call before-o-clock in the morning, and because of all manner of hiccups, didn't arrive until late in the afternoon. Jennifer and I were famished when we finally got to sit down and have this pizza, so it was the best pizza ever! It's funny how when you are particularly hungry, anything tastes like heaven. Is there a spiritual parrallel here? Do we encounter people in our lives who are so hungry for truth that anything they are given seems like the Truth? Are we some of those hungry people? Let's just call that food for thought.

Okay, last picture. It is of Kaleb, shortly after Jennifer and I tried to feed him during one of our baby-sitting adventures. If you can't tell, he was eating peas, or some similarly green vegtable. He was a better man than I am to eat the mashed up paste, but he finished it all up (That's my second food reference, I may need to go eat dinner). Anyway, I grabbed this picture because Kaleb looks beyond cool here, but it is only one of a ton of pictures I have of friends' kids. Jennifer and I decided a couple of years ago that children probably weren't in our future, but I can't tell you how blessed I am to be able to interact with the children in our little circle of friends. My weekly conversations with Katelyn about what comic books she is reading are starting to become one of my favorite reasons to come to church, and I know Jennifer feels cheated if she gets out of the building without a little "Kaleb-time". This weekend, we were able to spend some extended time with Lukas, who is really shaping up to be quite the little man (little horizontally, not vertically) and looks beyond spiffy in his helmet. It takes my breath away some times to look forward five or ten years and watch what great young people all of these kids are going to become. With the parents they have, I am confident that our future is in great hands.

Alright, I'm rambling. I love you, guys.

Can't sleep, Students will eat me!

2007-08-28T20:32:00.001-05:00

Okay, the title is really meaningless other than being a random Simpson's quote (sorry EDMC and TXmommy). In news that should surprise no one, I am far too busy to really update. Yesterday was my first day back to school with students. It is amazing how quickly one can shift back into work mode. I won't lie; I was genuinely dreading the end of summer, but I figured out about 4th period yesterday that I can survive this for four months until Christmas. After that, I may have to take it one day at a time.

Some changes have made my life easier, which has left me conflicted. I honestly believed that the changes were these too-cutesy gimmicks that would be dismal failures, but I begrudgingly implemented them and they are working like magic. Let me give you one quick example (because of the busyness). For the last three years, during our passing periods, our students have had the bad habit of congregating in the halls, causing congestion and keeping even the good kids that are trying to get to class from making it in a timely manner. For three years, I have been coming up to these groups of idle kids and exhorting them to get to class, usually by employing the very creative phrase, "Get to class!" For three years, my efforts have been met by rolled teen-aged eyes and resumed conversations. This year, our administration advised that when encountering this sort of situation, we recite the following poem to the kids, "Walk and Talk, Don't stop and block!" I mean, seriously! Like this will be effective, right? Well, yesterday I decided to be a good little soldier and went to my first group of congregating kids and recite the phrase. They looked at me, giggled (it was a group of girls), and then moved on to class! A fluke, you say? I went to a second group and gave the phrase. Instant dispursal. For two days now I've been reciting this stupid expression and everytime, the kids immediately comply. I am beyond confused, but I'm not going to complain.

Okay, seriously. I have to stop blogging and do some other work before going to bed and getting a decent night sleep.

The Summer Recap

2007-08-21T21:52:00.000-05:00

Much to my chagrin, the summer has come to an end. Today was On-Campus staff development, which is a fancy phrase that means, "getting you back into the habit of waking up at 6:00am and dealing with commuting before you have to deal with kids, so you don't snap when they do show up". It also, unfortunately, means, "the kids are going to show up." So I thought it would be appropriate to look back at what I accomplished with all of my free time this summer. In other words, this will be a short post. I've got to tell you, it would be kind of depressing to see how little I've done in the last two and a half months if I hadn't set out at the beginning of June to be as lazy as humanly possible. So, here we have Summer 2007 in review.

The Booger Crisis

Despite my best plans of lounging around and watching TV in a totally self-absorbed manner, we discovered in early June that one of our cats, the ever-agreeable Booger, had little kitty cancer. This is one of those things that still amazes me as I look back on it, as the vet was less than subtle in his views that we should put Booger to sleep. More than two months later, Boog is living life more closely to normal than should be expected with the only inconvenience being that we have to give him medicine twice a day. Now, I won't say that we are out the woods here, and things could turn tragically tomorrow, but I know that I've made two months of memories with Booger that I will never forget, and he has not been loved and babied more in his life than he has in these last few weeks.

The Greatest Animated Movie Ever

It tells you how slow my summer was when a movie premier ranks in my top three moments. In fairness, however, The Simpson's Movie was more than a movie. The advertising, especially the cross promotion with 7-eleven, was genius beyond words, and it didn't hurt that the movie itself was very good. By the way, the picture is of a "Simpsonized" Jennifer. You may be able to get a "simpsonized" version of yourself here, depending on if the site is working when you try it. It's been unpredictable for me.

Meet-on-a-stick (Did you catch what I did there?)
Our annual Paul-Fest was, as always, a success. Boi Na Braza made some dramatic improvements in the way that they deal with large groups, which really made the affair all the better. More than the food and the service, however, was being able to spend an evening with my favorite people ever. That fellowship is important beyond words, and it humbles me to know that so many of the people that I love are willing to take time out of their busy lives to celebrate with me. It's strange and counterintuitive, but it occured recently to me that this is the true mark of a connected people. We often feel so much pressure to serve that we help one another unthinkingly. Of course I would help Eric and Larissa move or Ryan and Ashley paint, but the truth is that if just about anyone asked for my help, I would probably pitch in and do my part because it is the "right" thing to do. It takes a real connection, however, to take the time to celebrate something with someone. There's always something more "important", more pressing, than going to a party or sharing a meal, but when someone invites you into these special moments of your life, your response says a great deal about how you regard that relationship. Again, I'm just humbled that so many of you wanted to share this celebration with me.

Well, that was my summer in a nutshell. It was restful, but rest is something I could always use more of. Pray for me this week, and especially next week, as those darned kids will actually be in class.

Quiz Results

2007-08-14T12:46:00.001-05:00

Okay, the results are in. The votes from last week's poll was fairly evenly divided between those of you who wanted to kiss up to me by asking about my Restoration History Class and those of you who are just cruel and wanted to hear about my physical mishaps. I'll give you quick looks at both. For the record, Randy was the sole desenter and wanted to hear about the comics. To Randy: I haven't gotten far enough to know about Jan becoming a real Wasp, but she changes outfits almost constantly, so maybe one of her outfits just really looked like a Wasp.
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Restoration History: I have been teaching this classs on and off for the last two months. My thesis for this class is that our movement begins in the midst of Enlightenment thought, which emphasizes logic and reason. This is why our movement is historically weak in issues like the Holy Spirit and Angels. Enlightenment thought also states that we as human beings are capable of solving any problems if they apply reason and logic. The founders of our movement, who were Enlightenment thinkers, struggled with the problem of Christian unity. Our movement, therefore, is a unity movement at its heart, calling all people to be one in Christ. Where we had problems, however, is in what unity looks like. It is one thing to say that all Christians are one, but it is another thing to believe this when you get together and one group uses a guitar and another prays to the Virgin Mary. Our enlightment thinking founders, therefore, "solved" the problem by saying that we would all be unified if we all did things the way they did things in the first century. Therefore the restoration movement, our desire to restore the first century church, began as an attempt to create unity in the body of Christ. But what do we think of christians who don't do things the way we think the first century church did them? The restoration principle, unfortunately, often comes into conflict with our unity principle. Historically speaking, CoC's have tended towards the Restoration principle. In other words, we would rather everyone do things the "right" way than to consider someone a brother or sister in Christ if they do things differently than what we would do. I think this trend is changing, but what do you think?
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Physical Breakdown: As I've mentioned before, Booger the cat does not enjoy taking his medicine. Twice a day, Jennifer has to fill a syringe full of foul-smelling gunk and shoot it into Boog's mouth while I hold him. Thi is decidedly a two person job, because the cat squirms wildly to avoid the treatment. Well, early last week, Jennifer left for work without giving Booger his medicine. I didn't think much of it, figuring that since I outweigh the cat by a factor of 30 that I could hold him down and give him his medicine. Long story short, I was wrong. I would hold him down, but displaying an incredible sixth sense, Boog would jerk away from me just as I pushed the plunger on the syringe. This resulted in both of us winding up with far more of the foul smelling gunk on us than in him. I didn't think anything of this until the next morning when I woke up and found my hands covered in a bright red rash that itched like heck! I'm now a little paranoid about medicating the cat, and am doubly careful about coming into contact with the medicine itself.
The rash breakout occured on the same day as my big bathtub fall, and I wish I could blame my stupidity on the medicine, but it was all me. Sunday morning, as we were once again rushing to get ready for Church in a timely manner, I was taking a shower. Just as I finished getting good and soapy (read: slippery), I noticed a bug crawling on the ceiling. Knowing that Jennifer would over react if she saw bug, I decided to play the part of the hero and squash said bug. Unfortunately, I was six inches too short to hit it, so I stepped up on the side of the tub to get leverage, immediately slipped, and smacked my head on the back of the tub. There was no blood, but I got a pretty good sized bump on the back of my head. For the record, the swelling has gone down and the double vision is getting much better.
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So, I've been writing this during staff development. We are back in the swing of things, and I am so not ready for school to start. Staff Dev. is good, but, boy, would I rather be goofing off.

Blog Quiz

2007-08-06T17:30:00.001-05:00

I decided to shake things up and give you a pop quiz. Don't worry, it's multiple choice and open notes. Good luck.

1. Which of the following inane topics do you want to hear about?

A) Paul's day of physical breakdown- In one day, I slipped in the shower and smacked my head but good, and discovered that my skin reacts very poorly to Booger's medication.

B) The Never Ending Comic- After two straight months, I am almost to the decade of the 80's in my 40 years of the Avengers DVD-Rom, leaving just three more decades to read through. I haven't cracked the DVD-ROM's of the Incredible Hulk, The Fantastic Four, Ghost Rider, The X-Men, The Ultimate X-Men, Captain America, or Spiderman. I have a sneaking suspicion that I will have something to keep me busy during my retirement years.

C) The Fading Summer- Wherein I whine about the fact that have to go back to work in like two weeks. Sure to be a popular choice among those of you who are not teachers (and my wife who is already back into the swing of things).

D) The Awesomeness that is The Simpsons' Movie- So worth seeing on the big screen if you are going to see it. The mockery of Disney was my personal laugh out loud moment.

E) Restoration History Recap- I don't know what it is, but I have felt like my Sunday Morning class at VRCC over the history of our movement has missed the mark. I can spend the blog explaining how our movement is the result of enlightenment thinkers struggling with the apparent disunity of God's church. Warning: Only to be read if you are fighting insomnia.

Alright, choose wisely. Remember to bubble in your answers completely with a number two pencil and to erase any stray marks.

Steer Over Embers

2007-07-30T13:53:00.000-05:00

As most of you know, last Saturday I celebrated my 33rd birthday (although today is my actual B-day). As has become our tradition, Jennifer arranged a fantastic meal at Boi Na Braza with many of our friends. For those of you unaware, Boi Na Braza is a Brazilian Churrascaria, which means that guys in funny pants bring loads of meat to your table until you explode or develop the willpower to flip a small card from the green side to the red side. All in all, fun times. I asked Jennifer to take pictures of the event, so here you go with my pictoral culinary journey.

In the picture above you will see me with the only menu you will find at Boi Na Braza, the large board at the front door that lists the meat that is served. You aren't close enough to see it, but I promise you that the sign informs you that at this location you can have every part of every animal you can imagine from the ears to the hoofs (and all of it is delicious).

Joanna was the first to join us for the evening, although only because she hitched a ride with us to the restaurant. She was, as always, a source of constant entertainment, sharing with us her stories of visiting the Comic Book shop to covertly pick up a birthday present for me (which rocked, by the way), and of an embarrasing game of Taboo with the fine folks at churchofchristsingles.com.

The Deisters took a break from packing for their Australia trip to join us. We were especially blessed this year with Andrew's newfound expertise on all Brazilian cuisine since he spent a couple of weeks in the country this year.

The Wages were part of the group as well. I was particularly thankful to have Alan there, as he inspired all of us to go for just one more plate of meat in honor of our absentee friend Kent. In fairness, however, Alan was not the last one finished, as our Maitre De commented on in the night's first big faux pas. As a side note, the preceding sentence may have been the most pretentious thing I have ever written.

Our one out of town guest was Regan who came with Randy and LaRae (who somehow managed to avoid Jennifer's camara). It's always awesome to see Regan, who is one of my greatest friends.

The Swayne's and the Brown's joined us as well. While Eric and Larissa are old pro's at the Boi Na Braza experience, I was excited to have the Brown's as this year's rookies. One of the thing's that I love about this tradition is the ability to take stock of the new people who have come into my life in the last year. The Brown's are phenomenal people that I am lucky to know and call friends.

Of course, one of our two youngest rookies was Lukas Swayne (the other being Joshua Price, who was as shy as his mother was), who seemed to enjoy the experience. In many ways, this meal is my opportunity to look back on the year in the lives of myself and my friends. While it always seems that very little changes in my life, this year was certainly the bumper crop of babies in our little group. Along with Lukas and Joshua, Kaleb Wages, Maddie Benfer, and Jacqueline Price have all seemingly joined our group overnight (okay, I know Jacqueline joined us more than a year ago, but I don't see her often enough to know how old she is. If you want me to put her in the right age group, Regan, come visit with her more often. We've got a guest room always ready for you).

Jamin was our last guest for the night. "The Body" was in rare form, and was particularly helpful in allowing the guys to win at Rachel's game of "Succotash" (Obscure Baseball players + Jamin and Alan= Big Wins).

It's interesting. As I thought about what I would write for this entry, I figured that I would focus on the extravagance of the meal, or the awesomeness of the presents I received (which they were), but none of those things defined why Saturday night was so special to me. It reminds me of this silly picture that Jennifer has hung in every apartment and house we have lived in since we got married. It says, "Count your age by friends, not years. Count your life by smiles, not tears." I'm not sure I ever understood it until now. Rachel and Larissa went to a comic book shop for me. Regan drove hundreds of miles to be there. All of you took the time to celebrate the day with me. If my life is to be counted by my friends, then it is a life overflowing with happiness.

Who Needs the Kwik-E-Mart?

2007-07-19T18:13:00.000-05:00

First things first, I recognize that the post is very late. I'll blame it on our VBS which was held earlier this week, although the truth of the matter is that my actual time at VBS was fairly limited, while I have spent most of my week reading back issues of Avengers Comics.

So, you might not have heard, but there is a movie coming out based off of the Simpsons animated TV show. I've always enjoyed the show personally, although I know that there are some of you opposed to it (for what reason I'm not sure). Where Kent last week mentioned the theological significance of Nacho Libre, I tend to see theological importance in many episodes of The Simpsons, and have even used part of an episode in a class at VRCC. For the record, my opinion is shared by at least some others in the world. Anyway, all of this is to say that I am looking forward to the release of the movie on July 27th.

As much as I am anticipating the release of the movie, I am already enjoying some of the pre-release marketing. In conjunction to the release of the movie, a handful of 7-Eleven's in the United State's have been transformed into the Simpsons' equivalent of the convenience store chain, The Kwik-E-Mart. One of the really nice things about living in Lewisville is that we are close enough to visit Dallas, where one of those stores appeared. More than anything, I'm impressed by the effort that was put into the redesign. They actually repainted the outside of the store (or put up a faux wall, which is no easier to create) as you can see from the pic above.

As you can see, just like everything else, the Kwik-E-Mart charges just a little bit more for its gas.

The whole store is an homage to various episodes of the series, such as this exhibit, where one of the tirtiary characters, Jasper, gets locked in the Kwik-E-Mart freezer, only to be woken a few minutes later believing that he has been cryogenically frozen and is now thirty years in the future.

As well as this sign. I'm not sure if you can read it, but it lists a number of candies that are not sprinkles, which is an almost exact recitation of a line that the Kwik-E-Mart manager, Apu, delivers to Homer when he tries to buy a suspiciously candy laden donut. Speaking of donuts . . .

In addition to increased signage, the Kwik-E-Mart's are offering four Simpsons themed items for purchase. The first are special Simpsons style donuts, complete with pink icing and oodles of sprinkles. Although I tend to turn my nose up at Donuts unless they come form Krispy Kreme, I have to admit that these were very good.

Two of the other Simpsons styled items are above. Frosted KrustyO's, sadly, is nothing but Fruit Loops, but the packaging is pretty nifty. I haven't tried the Buzz Cola yet because I'm saving it for my birthday party to see if it is as good as Moxie Cola. The last item, the Slushie, is just a renaming of 7-eleven's typical slurpee, so I didn't get a picture of it. I am, however, now addicted to the "Blue Vanilla" flavor slurpees / slushies.

Here we find one of the Kwik-E-Mart's most reliable customers, Marge Simpson. The store was littered with these 3-D versions of popular characters from the series. Sadly, I was unable to get a picture of my favorite one of these, Comic Book Guy. He was positioned on the outside of the store during my first trip, but before I came back with my camera, someone had taken him. On a related bit of trivia, Comic Book Guy was originally going to be named Louis Lane, which would have been awesome, but apparently the name didn't take.

Alright, here is a special reward for Joanna if she made it this far in the post. Jennifer saw this on the outside of the Kwik-E-Mart and broke into hysterical laughter. Apparently, it's a math joke.

Our week in Entertainment

2007-07-09T23:12:00.000-05:00

What a difference a little less than a week can make. Last week I informed you all of my technology woes, most notably my dish network upgrade that wasn't. Well, I'm happy to report that after a 30-minute service call, my satellite service is back in working order, including the reemergent ability to record three programs simultaneously. So, once again I am a happy Dish Network customer.

Last week without working television, Jennifer and I managed to get caught up on a lot of movies we had somehow missed. In between Netflix and a couple of visits to the local video rental place, we have watched eleven movies in the last five days. Since I have nothing much going on in my life that is blog-worthy, here are some quick reviews (Spoilers ahead):

1. Monster House- A cute little animated movie about a possessed house that eats people who trespass on the property (yes, I know that is a really weird sentence). For an animated movie, it really isn't kiddie fare, as there are more than a few scary movies, but it was enjoyable for Jennifer and I.

2. Talledega Nights- Not the best Will Ferrell movie, but more than a little fun. I'm sure this might offend some, but in my opinion Ricky Bobby's dinnertime prayer is worth the rental by itself.

3. Bridge to Terabithia- In the interest of full disclosure, I had never read the book. With that being said, it was a really good movie except that major characters should not die in "family friendly movies". That's all I'm saying.

4. Deja Vu- Time Travel, whether in movies or comic books, always leaves me with a headache, but this was a good take on it that kept you thinking. The movie leaves you with as many questions as it answers (most notably why Denzel Washington still gets leading actor roles), but it is certainly a fun ride.

5. Pirates of the Caribbean 2- It's hard to convince me that this wasn't just filler to get us to the third movie in the franchise. For the record, I despise the "Back to the Future" format, where one movie leads straight into its sequel and therefore can't stand on its own.

6. Zoom- Tim Allen will always be funnier on TV than in movies (there is even a joke to that effect in the closing credits) , but he isn't the reason you would watch this take on the super-hero academy genre (yeah, it's a whole genre now). For my money, Sky High did this better, but Zoom is worth a rental if for no reason other than the fake PSA's you will find in the special features section.

7. Nacho Libre- If Jack Black had done Napoleon Dynamite, but with wrestling instead of dancing, it would have been Nacho Libre. Unfortunately, I really did not like Napleon Dynamite, and Jack Black is far from my favorite comedic actor.

8. Breach- This was a really interesting spy story, and even based on a real story. Like all "based on a real story" movies, however, it doesn't get tied up in a neat little bow at the end, which bugs me some. Warning: This is one of those movies that you have to focus on, and you can't get it if you are multi-taking while you are watching it. Jennifer and I had to back it up several times because one or the other of us got distracted by something.

9. Touristas- I think it says something about the refinement of my cinematic taste that there aren't more horror movies on this list. Okay, it really says something about Jennifer's veto power when it comes to renting movies. This was the worst kind of horror movie, by the way. It wasn't necessarily gory; it was really just kind of boring.

10. The Fountain- I wasn't smart enough for this movie. I know it is based off of a graphic novel; I'm sure it was attempting to say something profound, but I spent two hours just confused out of my gourd.

11. Thank you for Smoking- This was well worth the rental. It was at times humorous, thought provoking, and, in its own way, touching. If you never thought you would root for a tobacco lobbyist, rent this and see if it surprises you.

Sorry for the pointless post this week, but maybe it will guide you through the long dry days of summer television programming.

Happy Whatever!

2007-07-04T09:09:00.000-05:00

To all of my friends who are not teachers, Happy Independence Day! I hope you are having a restful and relaxing day off. To those of you who are teachers, Happy Wednesday! I hope you weren't planning on going to the bank or the post office today. I know I'm the big History Teacher and all, but isn't there some way that we could move July 4th to sometime in April when I need a good three day weekend?

So, I've developed a new pet peeve: Upgrades that aren't upgrades! Last week I got a call from Dish Network saying that because of "improvements" that they were making to my service, I would need to get a new receiver to keep all of my HD channels. Before I could debate the logic of an improvement that placed a new burden on me, the operator explained that they would send the new receiver for free. Okay, not bad. Yesterday, I finally got around to hooking up the new receiver, and that is when everything fell apart. I can't get a picture on the TV, although the audio works just fine. After spending 45 minutes on the phone with the technician, we determined that I have a "LNB line drift", which the technician assured me was a pre-exisiting problem and not unique to the new receiver. Of course, he really couldn't explain why I had no problem with seeing TV with the old receiver. Worse yet, we have always been able to tape three things with the old receiver, but now can only do two. So, yeah, upgrades that are in no way an upgrade.

To keep me from losing my mind trying to fix the TV problem, Jennifer and I went out to the movies last night and saw Evan Almighty. I know it has received some negative reviews, but I really enjoyed it. It was as close as we will likely get to a mainstream Christian movie. There were some very positive, faith-promoting messages, and it was funny as well. I know my opinion doesn't carry a lot of weight with some of you when it comes to entertainment, but you really ought to catch it while it is still in theaters.

First and Last

2007-06-24T15:02:00.000-05:00

Hey, LaRae tagged me! So, here you go.

First and LastFirst Memory: I have a very distinct memory of sitting behind my mother as she drove her school bus (she is a school bus driver, BTW), her coffee slipping from where she placed it, and me catching it in mid-air without spilling a drop.

First Real Kiss: Oh, but there's been so many. In kindergarten, I snuck behind a mirror with a cute girl in a red dress, but I doubt that could be considered "real". I guess we would have to go with my first girlfriend, which would have been 10th grade (yeah, I was a late bloomer). I thought she was going to suffocate me with her tongue.

First Concert: I really think this would have to have been at ACU in Moody Coliseum. Probably Diamond Rio?

First Love: I should go with the pat answer and say Jennifer, but the fact is that I really loved the girlfriend I had a couple of girlfriends before her, Sara. Still, that was nothing compared to Jennifer (First doesn't mean best).

First crush: I already mentioned the cute girl in the red dress from kindergarten, didn't I?

First thing you think in the morning: "When is Jennifer going to turn off that stupid alarm?", which is really a stupid thought on days like today when she is out of town.

First book you remember loving: Probably The Monster at the End of this Book, although I have to give props to the Alfred Hitchock and the Three Investigators series of books, which was the first time I remember really devouring books joyfully.

First pet: Muffin, the toughest cat ever. I can't tell you how many times I saw that cat stand paw to paw with and eventually chase off big dogs.

First question you'll ask in Heaven: (In response to whoever asks their question before me) Who cares? We're in heaven now.

First thing you think of when you hear the word vacation: The Seafoam Motel in Nags Head, NC.

First best friend: Frank Watson. We were in kindergarten together, and he and I shared just about every lunch until he moved to Colorado in the 9th grade.

Last time you dressed up: Define "dressed up". I put a tie on last Sunday, which is dressing up for me nowadays.

Last thing you ate: Whataburger breakfast- Sausage, Egg, and Cheese Taquito and a Sausage Breakfast on a Bun.

Last CD you bought: "Hit" by Peter Gabriel and "Greatest Hits 2" by Toby Keith, both for Jennifer on our anniversary.

Last book you read: If comic books don't count, then it was Reviving the Ancient Faith: The Story of Churches of Christ in America by Richard T. Hughes.

Last time you cried: Yeah, it's no surprise that I wear my feelings on my sleeve and cry often enough to make Randy uncomfortable. Oddly, I get misty-eyed every time I see the preview for the movie Hairspray, where you see the kids taking part in a 60's-era protest, but the last time I really cried was when we got the last report about Booger from the vet.

Last movie you saw: I just saw a Bruce Campbell double feature on TV (The Man with the Screaming Brain and Alien Apocalypse), but in a theater I recently saw the second Fantastic Four Movie.

Last time you told someone you loved them: Well, Church was this morning, so I'm sure I told Jesus that I loved him somewhere in there. I told Booger that I loved him just a few moments ago when I checked on him. I told Jennifer that I loved her when she called a few hours ago on her way back. Telling people I love them isn't something I'm overly hesitant to do.

Last really funny thing you did: One of Booger's medical problems is that he has stopped eating, so I've taken to walking around our house with bowls of Booger's food. If he is in the bedroom, I bring him food in the bedroom. If he moves to the living room, I retreive the food from the bedroom and move it to him in the living room. I'm like Kitty Meals on Wheels nowadays.

Last thing you watched on TV: Fox News (currently doing a retrospective on the success of Ron Popeil).

Last Halloween costume: I really have absolutely no memory of the last costume I wore. For last year's fall festival, I wore a black shirt and Jennifer wore an orange one. Does that count?

Last Concert attended: I hate to end with a whimper, but I'm really not a concert goer. If my first concert was Diamond Rio at ACU, then my last one was probably Colin Raye, also at ACU. Is he the guy that did the song with the line, "I like the preacher from the Church of Christ"? I just remember everyone at Moody coliseum singing along and really shouting at that line.

Alright, I guess I will tag Eric and Kent.

Prayer Request

2007-06-20T11:16:00.000-05:00

I know I'm late on updating, but some fairly major things are going on right now. Booger is in kitty hospital right now, and they aren't quite sure what it is, but it's bad. I don't know how you feel about praying for the health and well being of animals, but I know Jennifer and I would appreciate your thoughts and prayers right now.

Being Mary in a Martha World

2007-06-12T09:53:00.000-05:00

At this moment, I am trying to do three things simultaneously. I am updating my blog (yes, a day late), waiting for the delivery of our new sleep number bed, and preparing for my sermon this Sunday at Baker Boulevard CoC. Although the sermon is rough right now, I think it will come out of Luke 10:38-42.

38As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. 39She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. 40But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!"
41"Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, 42but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.

I don't know whether it is my relative lack of busyness with school being out or what, but I have to confess that lately I've been feeling a lot like Martha in my spiritual life. This Sunday is the most recent example, if not the best. Jennifer and I both started Sunday early, as Jennifer had to be at church by 8:30 to rehearse with the praise team and I am teaching one of the Sunday morning classes. Literally as Jennifer was brushing her teeth with one hand to rush to this practice, she was flipping through a binder with the other so that she would be prepared for the children's class she was subbing in. When I got to church, I remembered that the person I had scheduled to prepare the Lord's Supper emailed me and told me that they wouldn't be there, so I went to the kitchen to complete that task. I finsished that with just enough time to set up my classroom before class time. The class itself was fine, but as soon as the "Amen" was said to finish the study, I collected my trusty clipboard and went about finding people to serve during worship. The worship itself (The actual time to be Mary-like, I suppose) was good, but immediately after that it was on to the leadership meeting to debate and discuss what we as a body can DO to serve the Lord. The meeting ended and I had a few hours to prepare for our Home Team meeting and Bible Study.

I'm torn on this issue, I guess. On one hand, I can see the problems inherant in substituting activity for contemplation (how many times can we have the faith vs. works discussion?), but on the other hand, it's not like the activity in question is pointless. What I do, what we all do in the church, is important. It's not like we can all put down the work we have been given to do and just sit in silent reflection over the words of God. Our faith has to have an active component. So how do we balance this?

I think the answer may be an issue of perspective. Perhaps the point is not that we should stop the busyness in our spiritual lives, but rather that we should remember why we take on all this busyness in the first place. The activity that we engage in is not our faith, but it is rather an outcropping of our faith. In other words, the work that we do is not the point, but it is a reflection of the time that we have spent at the feet of Jesus. Perhaps we could use a little more of this time, I suppose, but we shouldn't grow weary of the work we do in response to the love God has shown to us.

Happy Anniversary to Us (A little late)

2007-06-05T16:06:00.001-05:00

You'd think that being out of school would give me more free time. This is, by and large, the case, but I am currently in what I like to call the rebuilding phase of my summer vacation. This is the period of time (about a week or so in length) where I finally get to all the little things that have fallen through the cracks during the work year. I've spent most of the day cleaning our bedroom, which was quite a task. I'd post a picture, but I'm not sure where Jennifer put the camera (finding that will be my next rebuilding task).

One of the things that Jennifer and I have been able to do is to celebrate our 7th anniversary. Some of you are aware of the little tradition that Jennifer and I have about this day, but I thought it might make good blog fodder. Most of you are at least passingly familiar with the tradition of buying themed gifts based on which anniversary you are having. If you aren't, Wikipedia has the breakdown of the tradition here. Well, when Jennifer and I prepared for our first anniversary, we really tried to follow this. The first year is supposed to be paper (we were in the dark about the whole modern interpretation at the time). The problem is that you can go in two ways with paper, neither of which really worked for us. We didn't want to go the cheapskate route (Cards, homemade "coupon books"), but we didn't have enough money to go the expensive route (plane tickets, concert tickets). After many weeks of soul searching, we broke down and had a conversation about our predicament, ultimately deciding to scrap the tradition and make our own themed anniversaries instead. Each year we sit down and decide what our theme will be. Here, then, is the list of our Wedding Anniversary Traditional Gifts (thus far):

1st - Pajamas. This sort of makes sense, since the first year you still have all of those hot and heavy romantic feelings for one another and are as likely as you will ever be to appreciate a "sexy" gift. Our first anniversary, Jennifer gave me black silk pajamas, and I gave her something skimpy that probably shouldn't be described. Not surprisingly, I don't think either of us have worn our respective gifts in the years since.

2nd- Videos. Nothing particularly romantic here, but it was an opportunity to prove that we "knew" one another. I gave Jennifer The Phantom Tollbooth and Donald Duck in Mathmagic land, and she gave me one of the seasons of The X-Files.

3rd- Sacrifice. If I remember correctly, this hit us during one of our many financially tight years, but it turned out pretty well. I agreed to go with Jennifer to her ten year high school reunion, and she went to see wrestling with me. She so got the better end of this year, since I was the only spouse at her event and thus got an eternity of boring stories about people I don't know, while there were plenty of wives that got dragged to the AA Center to see Hulk Hogan flex his muscles for two hours.

4th- Food. Okay, this was a little bit of a cop out for us, as we buy food for one another as often as we tell each other, "I love you". This one is kind of hazy for me, but if I remember right, Jennifer bought me a big bag of candy and I took her out to a romantic dinner.

5th- Special Event. This one was a lot of fun, as Jennifer and I stumbled into an advanced screening of the movie Serenity. The movie itself was beyond awesome, but it was also really good because we spent the day at the theater standing in line and talking with one another, rediscovering why we fell in love with one another.

6th- Power Tools. I swear by all that is holy that this was not my idea. Having recently bought the house, Jennifer had been secretly bugged by a hedge that was growing out of control in our backyard, so she asked for hedge trimmers. I in return got a dremel set that is far more advanced than I need for my purposes (customizing action figures). As a side note, I've not once seen Jennifer use the hedge trimmers in question, although I recently broke them out to trim the bush that was bugging Jennifer (does that count as part of the anniversary present?)

7th- Wish List. Amazon.com is a wonderful thing, especially the part that allows you to create a wish list of things that you want others to give you (If you are thinking about me as my birthday approaches, mine is located here) . Again, this was a bit of a cop out for us, but it netted me "40 Years of the Avengers" and "44 Years of Fantastic Four", two DVD-ROM's that together consist of 1085 comic books, scanned cover to cover. In return, Jennifer received a basketball, a couple of CD's, and a bunch of cookware. The girl's got some odd tastes.

Although we usually don't officially decide what the theme will be until sometime in mid to late May, I pressed Jennifer to think ahead and here are a few of the frontrunners for upcomming anniversaries.

8th- Education. Jennifer wants to take a cooking class (not that she needs it), so I will go with her to this class if she will go to a class with me. The problem is I can't for the life of me think of a class I want to take, much less one I would subject her to. Any ideas?

9th- Home Improvement. This is coming sooner or later, but we need some time to save money. We will be updating either our master bathroom or the kitchen, but the details of this are still up for debate.

10th- Vacation. I have talked more than a little about our Nags Head vacation, which was quite good, but Jennifer has been wanting to take a cruise for forever. I'm okay with that as long as it isn't to someplace ordinary (no offense, but Mexico has been done to death). Jennifer jokingly mentioned the Mediterranean, which would be neat, but expensive. Maybe Alaska? I don't know. Anyone have a good cruise they would recommend?

Alright everybody, that's all I've got. Take care of each other.

Happy Memorial Day!

2007-05-28T18:57:00.000-05:00

Wow, time sure flies when you are listening to the world's worst student presentations for five days straight! The picture above is directed to them, although it might be a useful message for us all. Anyway, I apologize that I was unable to provide you my weekly update last week, but I should be back on schedule now.

Truth be told, I doubt that I would have been able to update today if it weren't for the wonderful three day weekend I'm enjoying. Jennifer and I have done a whole lot of nothing with our time, which is exactly the rest that I needed, although we did do some mall-crawling and grocery shopping earlier today. Needless to say, I hope that if you were able to get some time off this weekend, you took advantage of it.

I was asked by Kent a few weeks back to do a post on the recent network upfronts. The honest fact of the matter is that what was presented has really failed to spur my interest. However, since I have nothing better to talk about in this post, I will give you my top ten highlights of the upcoming schedule. A grid detailing the full fall line up can be found here. Alright, here they are:

10. The Sarah Connor Chronicles (FOX, Sundays at 8:00 CST, Midseason)- I'm not big on rehashing old ideas, but a made for TV version of the Terminator franchise could be a lot of fun, and one featuring Summer Glau of Serenity and Firefly fame is a must see. My excitement for this show, of course, is tempered by the fact that it is on Fox and will be cancelled after three episodes.

9. Journeyman (NBC, Mondays at 9:00CST)- A lead in from Heroes will certainly help this series, which revolves around a man who suddenly develops the ability to time travel (without the cuteness that is Heroes Hiro). From the descriptions I have read, the series will be equal parts going back in time to set right things that once went wrong (which is cool) and reminicing about the girl that got away (which will be considerably less cool).

8. Moonlight (CBS, Fridays at 8:00CST)- Mick St. John is a vampire, but he has dedicated himself to protecting humans instead of feeding off of them. This naturally will put him into conflict with the rest of the vampires that are hanging around, including his former bride, who sixty years ago ended his life and began his eternal death. For the record, Angel did this better, but since Angel isn't on the air anymore, this will have to do.

7. New Amsterdam (FOX, Fridays at 8:00 CST)- In what is becoming a trend in this countdown, New Amsterdam features a mysterious man with deep secrets. In this case, it is John Amsterdam, a NYPD detective harboring the secret that he is actually a 465 year old immortal. I would go more into depth about this show, but again, it's on FOX and will be cancelled before you get a chance to get hooked on it.

6. Pushing Daisies (ABC, Wednesdays at 7:00 CST)- You have to give any show that bills itself as a, "forensic fairytale" a shot. In this story, Ned utilizes his gift of bringing things back to life to quickly solve murders by having the victim name their killer. When his childhood sweetheart is one of the victims, however, Ned rashly brings her back and keeps her alive.

5. Reaper (The CW, Tuesdays at 8:00 CST) - Sam learns on his 21st birthday that his parents have sold his soul to the devil and he must now act as Satan's bounty hunter. Reaper is almost a parody of Marvel's Ghost Rider, but a series could have worse aspirations.

4. Chuck (NBC, Tuesdays at 8:00 CST) - To be honest, the set up ( a computer geek becomes America's most important secret agent when he is accidentally encoded with government secrets) didn't really appeal to me, but a preview on NBC.com and the fact that Adam Baldwin from Firefly and Serenity is in it makes it worth the watching.

3. Kid Nation (CBS, Wednesdays at 7:00 CST) - While on the surface this seems like CBS exploiting the Are you Smarter than a Fifth Grader? phenomenon from last season, there seems to be far more than that going on. In Kid Nation, 40 kids will work together to build a functioning society, including cooking food, running a business, and fashioning a new government. As a teacher, watching a bunch of arrogant kids fall on their faces week after week may become my new guilty pleasure.

2. The IT Crowd (NBC, Midseason Replacement) - I love puns in titles! This is the unofficial sequal to The Office, insofar as it is an American take on a British workplace comedy. Several of the Executive Producers for this series also produce The Office, which makes it good enough for me. The fact that it features the very funny Joel McHale is a plus.

1. Heroes: Origins (NBC, Mondays at 8:00 CST, Midseason) - Perhaps in the most telling comment on this season, what I'm most looking forward to is a rehash of something from last season. One of the worst trends from the last few years is hit series going on break for a few weeks instead of airing reruns. It was a bold plan to keep people from complaining about the encore episodes, but it appears to have failed miserably, as everything from Heroes to Lost, well, lost viewers when they came back from their breaks. In an inventive move, Heroes will take their break, but will be replaced by Heroes: Origins, where we will meet new super-powered folk, with one of them winning a spot in season three of the main show. That is a well thought out plan, and it will get my viewership.

Okay, those are the positives, but there are complaints. Here are two (in no particular order).

1. Cancelled Series- Tough year on this front. I will really miss Veronica Mars, The Class, and most of all, Jericho. I'm blaming Kelly for the last one, as she steadfastly refused to watch the show no matter how strongly I extolled its virtues.

2. Cavemen- No, Seriously? This is a joke, right? You cancelled Knights of Prosperity for this?

That OLD Timey Feeling

2007-05-15T16:05:00.000-05:00

I mentioned briefly that I change the background on my computer frequently. The picture above is the current one, but it will soon be changing. One of my students saw it and asked me if Larissa and Rachel were my daughters! So, yeah, I'm feeling old today.

Of course feeling old may be a by-product of not enough sleep. Thursday night I was at the school until 2:30am grading atrocious power points that my students were working on, then Jennifer's parents came in on Friday, which was a good visit but not necessarily conducive to sleeping well. I preached on Sunday, which meant my weekend was filled with preparing the sermon (which did not go well). Tonight (Tuesday) I've got a late meeting and even more grading to do. I desperately need summer to get here.

I will likely make a more in depth post later in the week over the Upfronts that are being revealed this week (where the TV networks tell us what shows we will see next season), but the short answer right now is that I'm not overly impressed. They are doing a remake of Bionic Woman (like that makes any sense apart from the Six Million Dollar Man franchise) and a comedy inspired by the very unfunny Geico commercials starring the Cavemen. There are some possibilities, I guess, but right now I'm not excited.

I'm an award winning Geek!

2007-05-07T13:49:00.000-05:00

Last week, I mentioned several comic book related blogs for your reading pleasure. One of them, Living between Wednesdays (I love that title) was running a contest about your most prized geeky possession. On a lark, I entered this photo of the awesome painting job that Jennifer and I did (okay, Jennifer did) of the Booster Gold wall in my comic book room. As you will see by following the link, I am officially the geekiest person ever (that may be a bit of an overstatement).

In honor of this, well, honor, and based off of a suggestion that Randy made to me, I wanted to spend a little geek time with you today.

Geek Topic #1- The end of 52 (Spoilers, obviously)

It was suggested that this might lure LaRae into commenting on my board, so here we go. First of all, I loved 52 and felt that it did an admirable job of elevating some previously underappreciated characters (cough* Booster Gold *cough). I won't say that I was disappointed by the ending, because anything that claims to be the beginning of the "glory days" of Booster Gold can't be bad (although I would argue that the "glory days" started with issue one of his first series. However, I don't think 52 did a good enough job of explaining how all of the earths diverged. We see Mr. Mind sucking pieces of history up, and all of a sudden we have the CSA, or the Atomic Knights, or Kingdom Come, etc. Huh? I may be a little silver age here, but I really want them to go back and say, "Mr. Mind made it so that such and such event did not happen, and therefore this is how Vic Sage and Dan Garrett are still alive." Hopefully, we will see some of this in the new Booster Gold series (!) that will debut soon. Speaking of spin-offs, I would so buy three copies of a "Ralph and Sue Dibny: Ghost Detectives" series. They would rock!

Geek Topic #2- Free Comic Book Day or The FCBD that almost wasn't!

Saturday sucked a little. Jennifer was helping out at the IISD job fair, so she had to leave home at 7:00am. Terry's didn't open until 10:00, so that gave me some lounging time, which should have been awesome. However, Jennifer got as far as the church before figuring out she had a flat tire. In a hurry, she came home and traded cars with me. No big deal, right? Changing a flat tire may take ten to fifteen minutes. However, Jennifer's car didn't have a jack. Luckily, we had an extra jack that I took out of my car before we traded it in for my current car (aren't I a stinker). Unluckily, the lug wrench on the extra jack didn't fit Jennifer's lug nuts, or rather fit them too perfectly, because once the lug nuts were off the wheel they were literally stuck in the lug wrench. In my infinite wisdom (or because I've watched one too many episodes of I love Lucy) I decided that the way to solve it was to get something slippery to loosen the nuts. Lacking in anything approaching manly car fixing stuff, I opted for what I know best: Food! To my eternal surprise, some extra virgin olive oil worked perfectly, at least on the first one. After that, the lug wrench became too slick for me to get any leverage on it. Therefore, I washed the lug wrench off and went to work on the second lug nut, which promptly got stuck because the lug nut was too big for that lug wrench. So I reapplied the EVOO (isn't Rachel Raye great!). It became this sort of ludicrous two step process to get the lug nuts off, but it worked on all of them, except for the last lug nut, which for some reason, was three sizes smaller than all the rest and therefore would not take my lug wrench. I do not have the space to explain every hair brained idea I tried to fix this malady, but let's say that more than a few things got broken and I have some newly earned battle scars. Finally in desperation, I surrendered and vowed to walk to Terry's for FCBD (because that is how loyal I am tomy geekdom). Luckily for me, I happened to notice that there is an auto parts store half a mile down the road. I went in, found a lug wrench, walked back and finished the process of putting on the new tire in like five minutes. Unfortunately, in all of my machinations, I bent the rim of the wheel, but that is a whole other story.

FCBD was only "meh". Terry didn't have everything that I thought he would have when he claimed to be a "Gold Sponsor", but in fairness, neither did Lone Star (which I drove to in my newly minted death car) and they only let you get one item.

Okay, that wasn't entirely a geek story, but it sort of keeps with the theme of the post. Alright, ladies and Gentlemen, my conference period is just about over and I'm out of things to talk about (although as Joanna points out things are better in three's). Feel free to talk about your geekiness in the comments section.

Why a good nights sleep is important

2007-04-30T12:12:00.000-05:00

So, today started out interestingly. I woke up late because yesterday I took a mid afternoon nap and therefore wasn't tired enough to fall asleep until midnight. In the midst of rushing to get to work this morning, I got dressed without adequately checking my clothing. Usually this just results in mismatched socks or a tie that clashes with my shirt. Today, it resulted in putting on a pair of pants with a rip that extended from approximately my right hip to my left shoelace. Seriously, there is no describing how bad this rip was in any language that would do it justice. I can not explain, either, why it wasn't until 7:50, 15 minutes before students walk in my classroom, when I finally discovered the rip. I found ten safety pins to put my clothes back together, but that only lasted until the first time I sat down (which was approximately 10 minutes after my students came into class). My pants literally began to disintegrate! I survived without major exposure (largely because I hid behind my desk for the first 3 periods). I am eternally thankful for Jennifer who bailed me out.

In other news, I have found a couple of interesting links for the comic book geeks in my audience. Check these out if you get a chance:

Comics should be good! - A weekly updated site that lists various comic book myths. An interesting examination of some of the more obscure parts of comic book history.

Comics Make No Sense - This site appears to largely be a chance to make fun of the Fantastic Four, but it is pretty funny and it is updated nearly everyday.

Living Between Wednesdays - This is the blog that I would write if I were a 26 year old Canadian girl. It is updated more often than mine, and hers contains some great and witty comics observations.

Last new business for the day: Wade is always making these great questions of the week that I am a little envious of, so I thought I would throw one out there. Several of you have heard that the only big fight that Jennifer and I have really ever had in our marriage is over the thermostat in our home. You see, I prefer things a little chilly, and Jennifer likes to not pay $300.00 a month on our electrical bill. It is still true that this is the only major fight we have had, but I discovered a new difference between us. The picture is my current desktop background. It may be some undiagnosed ADD on my part, but my background changes at least monthly, often times more frequently. A few weeks ago, quite innocently on my part, I changed Jennifer's desktop background to something I thought was cute. The response I received from Jennifer was not exactly a sign of gratitude. It turns out that Jennifer has a fanatical loyalty to the "bliss" default background that most people reserve for charismatic cult leaders and Diet Coke. In her own words, I moved her cheese. So my question is, how often do you change your desktop background? And what background are you using right now for your desktop?

Some Random Topics

2007-04-24T14:10:00.000-05:00

Okay, I lied. I told you that as soon as I was done with TAKS that I would have a, "much more thoughtful post" for you, but it turns out that there is very little going on upstairs right now. The honest truth is that I am tired and counting the days until school is over, and will be beyond busy until then.

This Friday, my students will be going on their big annual field trip to Ripley's Believe it or Not! / Palace of Wax. Of course, annual is a relative term since this is the first time in three years that my students have managed to stay out of trouble long enough for them to keep their field trip. I'm sure it didn't slip your attention, but we are going to one of my favorite places in the metroplex (which is why several of you have been forced to go at one point or another). Ripley's was, of course, my idea, and this was my first opportunity to organize a field trip. Let me tell you, it is a lot more effort than I thought it would be. Currently I'm torn about whether or not I will volunteer to head this thing up in the future. Part of me thinks that it would be alot easier in the future because I know what pitfalls to avoid. Another part of me is tired of getting the blame for the trip not being perfect and none of the credit for pulling it off. It's a little bit of a thankless job.

Of course, I could have the decision taken out of my hands if a certain high school in Lewisville would get off of their duff and fire a Social Studies teacher and make an opening for me. Last week I went to the LISD job fair and had a positive experience overall. One interview went exceptionally well, but the campus unfortunately wasn't hiring my content area at the time. There are still a few weeks until most people who won't return next year make that fact official, so be praying that God opens a door for me in Lewisville if that is his will. I've been impressed with what I see in the district, and feel that I have a tremendous amount to offer as well. Plus, exchanging my 45 minute commute for a 10 minute one would ease my stress levels a bunch.

Last little comment in my stream-of-conscious post: Are you watching Drive on FOX? If you aren't, you should be. It has Nathan Fillion, for those of you who enjoyed him in Firefly, and it has a lot of the Lost vibe of things going on behind the scenes that you try to figure out with the characters. Also, it is about this super secret, cross country race, which gives it some of the feel of Amazing Race. So in other words, it has everything you could want in a one hour show on Mondays at 7:00 (It doesn't even conflict with Heroes). If you have missed some episodes you can catch them here. Just scroll to the bottom where it says "Drive on Demand.

A Quick TAKS Poem

2007-04-16T21:57:00.000-05:00

I have sunk low enough to steal from mass emails I've received. The reason for my degradation, as I'm sure you know, is that this week is the TAKS test. My life gets much better next week, so expect a much more thoughtful post then.

NOT ON THE TEST

Go on to sleep now, eighth grader of mine.

The test is tomorrow but you'll do just fine.

It's reading and math. Forget all the rest.

You don't need to know what is not on the test.

Each box that you mark on each test that you take,

Remember your teachers. Their jobs are at stake.

Your score is their score, but don't get all stressed.

They'd never teach anything not on the test.

The School Board is faced with no child left behind

With rules but no funding, they're caught in a bind.

So music and art and the things you love best

Are not in your school 'cause they're not on the test.

Sleep, sleep, and as you progress

You'll learn there's a lot that is not on the test.

Debate is a skill that is useful to know,

Unless you're in Congress or talk radio,

Where shouting and spouting and spewing are blessed

'Cause rational discourse was not on the test.

Thinking's important. It's good to know how.

And someday you'll learn to, but someday's not now.

Go on to sleep, now. You need your rest.

Don't think about thinking. It's not on the test.

Fifteen Minutes of Geek

2007-04-09T14:08:00.000-05:00

I've been toying with the idea of creating another blog (the fourth that I would be associated with), that would serve as a weekly opportunity to review the best comic books I read in a week. I haven't made up my mind about that, but since I have nothing to talk about in this space, I thought I would give it a trial run here. So, here are two issues I enjoyed this week (Note: I am flying without a net here, as the issues in question are actually at home. Forgive any minor errors.) (Note Two: Spoilers Ahead)

Justice League of America #7

This was hailed as the issue that would finally pull the league together, and it delivered on that promise. The cast was solidified, although without surprise if you had been reading the previous six issues. This was a missed opportunity in my opinion, since it is always good to do something unexpected in the era of the internet where there are no more surprises. A member that they have been building up (such as Red Tornado) choosing not to join would have created some drama and given the new League something to prove in a sense, as Reddy would serve as the voice of the naysayers on the message boards. Also in this issue, the league gets a new headquarters, which I'm partially happy with. The JLA will be stationed in the brand new Hall of Justice (looking exactly like it did in the old Super Friends cartoon). However, not all is as it seems. Apparently there is a teleporter set up at one door that transports the JLA to a satellite orbitting 22,300 miles above the earth. The exact mileage is an homage to the satellite era JLA, which is cool, but the satellite itself looks like the one featured in the Justice League Unlimited cartoon, which is not cool in my books. It is a pet peeve of mine when the comics are adjusted to make them fit in better with the popular media (Spider-Man being put back in his black suit to match up with the upcoming movie is another example of this). Finally, the issue introduced some future storylines to us, as Geo-Force has reappeared, more than a little nuts and with the power of his dead sister, T.O. Morrow is being chased by a Starro proxy, and the revelation that Trident is apparently Karate Kid from a version of the Legion of Super Heroes that ceased to exist twenty years ago. That is alot to fit into a comic book, and it was handled very well.

Avengers: The Innitiative #1

Just to keep things fair, I will look at a Marvel book as well. The Innitiative is another of the books that follows the fallout of the recent Civil War in the Marvel Universe. In this series, we find out that a training camp has been built on the grounds of the recently destroyed school in Stamford, CT, and all the newly registered heroes are sent there to learn how to be real super heroes. We are quickly, but adeptly, introduced to a ton of new heroes, including Armory, whose weapon arm can take the form of any weapon, Cloud Nine, who can fly using her mastery of a gas of unknown content, and MVP, a "Captain America Jr." whose heightened strength and reflexes stem from being the great grandson of the guy who made Steve Roger's super soldier serum. There are countless others, but these guys are most important in this issue. There is a really great use of humor in this opening issue, as each character is allowed to bounce off one another and develop their personality. The humor, however, is just a set up, as one of our new recruits will be tragically killed and one recruit will wash out of the program!

Okay, thanks for indulging me this week. Let me know what you think of a weekly review blog, and chime in with reviews of your own.

Meet Jeff!

2007-04-02T13:46:00.000-05:00

Sorry, but I've got another brief post for you. TAKS is kicking my butt, so don't expect much deep thought right now (that sort of thinking is discouraged by the current state mandated testing system anyway). However, my good friend Jeff Emery commented on my last post, therefore giving me the opportunity to visit his exceptional blog. If you are looking for deep thoughts, give him a visit.

His entries are the deeper thought type of stuff I have hoped you would see at the P.E.A.K. brothers blog. Speaking of which, you really ought to stop by and contribute to my "Better know a VRCC'er" game, which has really been enjoyable for me at least.

Alright, back to coming up with an idea to teach for tomorrow. I'm getting evaluated.

A Quick Funny

2007-03-27T09:02:00.000-05:00

I can't believe I have sunk this low. I am short on time and material, so I'm going to share the unintentionally funny thing I heard on the radio this morning.

My local radio station has been asking listeners to call in and brag on their children. This morning a woman who was obviously excited to be on the air called to tell about her two children, a boy and a girl. She bragged about how each of them were well behaved and obedient. She listed their names and mentioned something specific each one had done to earn this compliment. She ended quickly, so the host tried to fill the allotted time by asking some questions about her two children:

Host: How old are your two kids?

Caller: Seven and Fourteen.

Host: And which one is older?

Caller: (Without missing a beat) The Fourteen year old one.

Host: *Stunned Silence* Thanks for your call, Sharon.

And we're home

2007-03-18T15:14:00.000-05:00

So, the best laid plans of mice and men, I guess. As you know, on the second day of our wonderful spring break trip, I tripped (no pun intended) over the cord of my computer and boke the monitor. Therefore, the lack of updates. Now, I'm keenly aware that you don't care enough about my last week to want a moment by moment breakdown of the trip, but I've got nothing else to talk about and I'm really not ready to think about a lesson plan for my kids tomorrow, so I'll give you the thumbnail look at my week in Kitty Hawk:

Sunday

Jennifer and I spent most of the morning waiting for our luggage to show up, although we did so clothed (gosh, some of you really can't take a joke about nudity). By the time the luggage showed, I wasn't eager to go out, so we lounged around our pretty vacation home. This was when we learned of the one major drawback to the home:

The neighbors brought this beautiful canine on their vacation, however they decided to keep him out almost constantly. His barking was incessant, to say the least.

Monday

Today, we had the opportunity to be all nostalgic, driving around to familiar haunts. I showed Jennifer the department store where I always bought a toy on the way into town (although now it is a furniture store, darn progress). We also went to the Sea Foam motel and the trailer park where my parents kept a trailer in Rodanthe. We spent a lot of time on this day picking up shells on the beach. Finally, we stopped at the Bodie Island Lighthouse, which was really cool when I was a kid. Unfortunately, a lot of the kid friendly stuff had been removed, although my math geek of a wife found some interesting examples of conic sections, so it worked for her.

Tuesday

Today was the greatest day! It was a themed day around flight, starting with us accidentally visiting a new "frontiers of flight" memorial located where I thought the entrance to the dunes were (for the record, you should always trust your wife with a map over your 15-plus year old recollection when it comes to driving directions). Once we found the dunes, we flew a cheapy kite for several hours. I have no clue why this is fun, but it is incredibly fun and relaxing, especially on a Tuesday when you would normally be dealing with bored teenagers. We finished the day by visiting the Wright Brothers memorial, which was a strenuous climb if nothing else.

Wednesday

You shouldn't underestimate your own recuperative power. After the climb up the dunes and the Wright Brothers Memorial yesterday, Jennifer and I preemptively decided that today would be a day to relax and regain our strength, but we woke up feeling just fine. I finally got around to doing some grading while Jennifer tried in vain to find something crafty to do on her own. For dinner, we ate at Mako Mike's, which was only okay for food, but had a great environment, including the picture on the wall that you see above.

Thursday

Today we went to Roanoke island, which was not as mind-numbingly boring as one would suppose. LaRae asked if one could really see a colony that billed itself as lost, and the answer to that is apparently, "no". Below you will see a picture of Jennifer standing in what remains of the Lost Colony. Far more exciting was Festival Park, which included a replica of the Elizabeth II ship on which early settlers came to America. The park attendents did the always lame "I was born in 1542, so your world seems very strange to me," gimmick, but they were not as obnoxious about it as they could have been.

Friday

Today was all about getting souveniers and packing up. It was busy, but nothing blogworthy. Here is a picture of our cat Booger to make up for the fact that I have nothing interesting to say:

Saturday

Time to head home! There is a lot to go through on this day, probably enough for a separate blog entry. We stopped at Hardee's for breakfast and learned that the North Carolina public school system needs to do a better job of teaching basic math skills. We saw the Hampton Coliseum, the site of my high school graduation and, more importantly, my first live wrestling event. We spent several quality hours at the Newport News-Williamsburg "international" airport learning that our transportation headaches were fairly minor. We also had time to do a little nostalgic sightseeing, visiting my high school and this, my childhood home:

Yeah, it's pretty now, but imagine it without the flowers or swing, and instead with sunflower yellow siding everywhere that you see white. Oh yeah, baby, that's home.

Actually, here is home, and I'm thankful to be back.

We're Here, but we're Naked

2007-03-10T18:20:00.000-06:00

Have I mentioned lately how much I loathe travelling? Our morning started officially when Joanna (the greatest friend in the world) picked us up from our house at 4:45am. That was the easy part of our trip. We arrived at DFW before 5:15 for our 6:30 departure, only to find the whole world in line to check in with U.S. Airways. Halfway through the Cattle call, the ticket agent opened a brand new line, which meant everyone who came in after us rushed over to this line and were checked in before us.

Security was, to put it mildly, thorough. After we removed our shoes and belts and cell phones and appendixes to put them through the X-Ray machine, I walked through the Metal detector with no problems. Jennifer, on the other hand, was missing part of her boarding pass, so she was forced back into the cattle call that is the U.S. Airways check in. Do you know that helpless feeling when you're separated from your loved one against your will? It isn't enjoyable. To make matters worse, as soon as I gathered my materials together, what did I find in between my wallet and my left shoe? That's right, the other part of Jennifer's boarding pass. Wanting to spare Jennifer the needless standing in line, I decided to be the sacrificial male and leave the terminal to find her, even though it would mean going through the heinous security again. For the record, if you ever want to play the part of the sacrificial male in a situation like this, don't ask the security person who just looked at your laptop warily where the exit to the terminal is. To them, this might seem suspicious. To make this really long story only a little longer, Jennifer and I found each other again, once more braved the harrowing security, and got to our gate with no time to spare.

Of course, no time to spare in aviation terms doesn't quite mean what you and I would mean by this. We got to the gate, were allowed on the plane, squeezed into the tiny little airplane seats, and sat in the sweltering plane for forty-five minutes on the tarmac. This, of course, made us late to our connecting flight in Philadelphia, a little two engine contraption with literal propellers. On the positive side, they held the plane for us. On the negative side, they didn't hold the plane for our luggage. So we are finnally here in Kitty Hawk, North Carolina and, as we understand it, our luggage is currently revolving around the baggage claim three hours away in Newport News, Virginia.

Notice how calm and relaxed Jennifer is in this picture. This was taken in the terminal at Philadelphia. She is so graceful under pressure, even when we thirty minutes late for a flight.

Now, this is Jennifer after dealing with the people of U.S. Airways about our luggage. It has been a difficult day to say the least. Tomorrow, since Jennifer and I will apparently have to be clothed in the only clean outfits we have, our birthday suits, expect lots of pictures of the Vacation home. Don't worry, we will watch out for mirrors. Until then, here are a couple of pictures to whet your appetite.

Spring Break or Bust!

2007-03-05T09:47:00.000-06:00

About Wednesday of last week my principal sent an email out to all the teachers with that title in roughly 32 point font. You know you are taking a beating when even the public face of the school is ready for the break. My class is on autopilot until the Break, which starts at the end of the day on Friday for us. I've made copies and planned lessons, none of which are overly exciting, but all of which will keep the kids quiet and working until the bell rings at 3:45 on Friday. It's bad, I know, but this is the week that a tight leash has to be kept, because someone taught these kids that murder is acceptable as long as it happens the week before a big vacation.

Anyway, the real reason I am posting is to let you know about next week. From what I understand, our rental home has free hi-speed internet, which means updating shouldn't be a problem. If this turns out to be true, I will try to update daily like Andrew Deister does when he takes big trips. If this doesn't work out, I will give you a big post when I return. Until then, here is another picture, this one from the Kitty Hawk Memorial that Jennifer and I will visit sometime next week.

I'm a little down today, by the way, so pray for me if you get a chance. Okay, last North Carolina picture until next week. Here is a pretty Sunset overlooking one of the fishing piers.

Is that the smell of desperation?

2007-02-26T15:55:00.000-06:00

So, the 4th six weeks ended on Friday and my grades are due this afternoon. Because I am either a compassionate person or a glutton for punishment, I showed my students their grades and offered to let them come in after school today to make up work (despite my steadfast promise that I wasn't going to allow make up work). So, yeah, I am anchored to my desk for the forseeable future while kids work.

As most of you know, I am a fan of the way in which Joanna does this whole blog thing, especially her insistance on always having a picture. The problem is that I don't have many good pictures on my laptop, and the ones I do are either of you, my friends, or the cats. So, here is a cat picture. It is not only a cat picture, but a picture of the clean bed Jennifer and I wish we had. You see, we have the bed part down, but not so much the clean part.

How do we go from a nice clean bed to the vertical surface to stack clothes on that we have now? How do my students go from intelligent motivated learners to bleary-eyed little dears praying that they can find that one last assignment they were supposed to turn in three weeks ago? It has every thing to do with persistance and never growing tired of good work.

I and Bryan have just finished our class on confession and the principle is the same. I go along doing what I ought, and then just one night of being too tired to do what is right, one moment where it is easier to give in to sin then resist it, and it seems all is lost. I didn't decide to one day dump laundry on my nice clean bed. It started with one morning being in too much of a rush to make the bed, and then I thought as long as the bed isn't made it wouldn't be too wrong to throw my jacket on the bed, and before you know it, I'm sleeping on the couch for want of space.

Let's look after the little things before they become the big things.

Hobbies Cure Stress?!?

2007-02-19T16:23:00.000-06:00

Well, this week is getting off to a great start! Last night, mere moments before the Wages' were set to show up to watch the Amazing Race, we had unexpected difficulties with our plumbing. I was doing laundry and when the rinse cycle started, dark blue water started draining into both of our toilets and bathtubs! It was not pretty. Anyway, Jennifer made plans for a plumber to visit us today while I was work, but this morning I woke up sick. I think it is mostly allergy related (head and body ache, scratchy throat, etc.), but I wasn't enjoying life.

It's a little ironic since my sermon yesterday was from Psalm 46 ("Be still and know that I am God"). My message was that we are built with the need to escape the business of our lives from time to time and just recharge our connection to God. So, apparently, I need to live what I preach and my body decided that it was time to do so.

As most of my sermons are, this one came from a personal place. I feel like I've been running 90 to nothing lately as I've been struggling to get kids ready for TAKS. Church is as busy as always if not busier as I have started to take over the coordination of worship. I am also coming to the realization that since Jennifer is the big time administrator, I am the one home early enough to wash clothes and dishes. Anyway, enough whining. My point is that life has been busy and I need to recharge.

There are a couple of ways to recharge, I guess. It suddenly occurs to me that I haven't used one of those ways since the summer. There has not been an addition to my custom Super Powers collection in six months. Altough the pictures are lousy, you can see that the collection is already large. Above are the heroes. Here are the villians. Those of you unaware, for the last few years I have been taking action figures from a childhood collection (The "Super Powers" line from Kenner), and reshaping them into new members of the DC universe. I'm not sure why, but this hobby keeps me sane, calming me and giving me a great sense of accomplishment when a new figure is born. Some of them are simple repaints, like taking a Flash, adding some yellow paint, and calling him Professor Zoom. Or I can add some red and blue to a Wonder Woman (and Jennifer's snazzy homemade skirt) and get Supergirl. See the picture below for those examples. Other times, I'm more like the creepy kid next door from Toy Story and take parts of different figures to make who is more than the sum of his parts. For example, the 70's era hero Black Lightning is made with Firestorm's arms, Martian Manhunter's body (including his bulky boots), and Hal Jordan's head. Alright, this was a pointless post, but I appreciate you reading. Have a great day!

A little paint makes Flash into Professor Zoom and Wonder Woman into Supergirl.

Firestorm, Martian Manhunter, and Green Lantern all contribute to making Black Lightning the "flyest" Super Hero in my collection.

Eating Sin

2007-02-13T15:47:00.000-06:00

Last Friday I did what I normally do when Jennifer is out of town. I camped out at the AMC movie theatre at Grapevine Mills Mall and had a night of movies. I watched the Messengers, which was good although uneven in some respects, and the Good Shepherd, which was intriquing with a nice twist, but it didn't really know how to end. Sandwiched in between these two films was the latest offering from Fox Faith, a movie called The Last Sin-Eater. The movie was about a Celtic community living in the foothills of the Appalachian mountains (ah, home!) who carry their traditions with them from the old country. One of the most valued traditions is that of the Sin-Eater, who comes at your funeral and eats off of your dead body, symbolically swallowing your sin so that you may enter Heaven. The crux of the film is about a young girl who can not wait until death for someone to take her sins away, but needs relief from them while still alive. Of course, she learns about Jesus, the last real sin-eater, who took all of our sins upon himself in his death. This isn't intended to be a movie review or recommendation, but there are worse things to watch in the theaters today. Of course, there are also better things to watch as well.

What interested me was the clear dichotomy the movie showed. In essence, the movie said, "Jesus good; Sin-Eater bad." I'm not so sure that it is as clear cut as all of that. Now let me be clear here: I'm all about the "Jesus good" part. No one is arguing this. More than that, putting your faith in some random person to eat food off of you so that you can get in to heaven is the epitome of goofiness. But, I see a couple of symbolic lessons in the sin-eater story that we can learn from:

We must die before we can be forgiven- The heart of the protagonists dilemmia in the movie is that she doesn't want to die before her sins are forgiven. But the Bible says that we must die to ourselves and our sinful life before we can be born again. Now, it is certainly true that Jesus died for our sins while we were still lost, but for that sacrifice and this forgiveness to mean anything to us today, we must die to the world.

We eat one another's sin- Most of you know that I am teaching a class on confession. This is about as good a definition of confession as I've seen. We eat one another's sin. You confess to me, and I take that sin upon myself. If all I do when I receive confession is nod my head and act sympathetic, but then leave you to your struggles, what good is it? Instead, when we receive confession, we take that struggle up with one another so much so that if you fall into that sin again, it is I who have failed.

Okay, enough preaching. I love you, guys.

It's still Raining . . .

2007-02-08T14:40:00.000-06:00

Have you ever had one of those days where it doesn't matter how much you do, how hard you work, how noble your intentions, you are still a dismal failure and disappointment to those around you? Yeah, that's my week. I've been called everything from an incompetent teacher to a tool of Satan this week. I've made two students cry and one threaten to slash my tires. I'm drained, deep in my soul, and I need to refocus on those things that matter. Pray for me, and know that no matter how badly I mess up, I'm doing the best I can.

They're coming to get you, Barbara . . .

2007-02-05T09:41:00.000-06:00

Different kind of post today. I'm really busy, but nothing of what I'm busy with is worth posting about, although I am very proud of the fact that I cleaned out our pantry this weekend. You know it's been too long when you find Christmas Candy from 2005!

Anyway, with nothing worth posting about, and in honor of the Scary Movie Night Eric, Alan, and I will have some time soon (I hope), I have a hypothetical horror related question:

When, as the picture describes above, all the cemeteries close and zombies walk amongst us, where will you hide out and why? Jennifer and I have this conversation alot on long trips (if by conversation you mean I talk while Jennifer messes with the radio and pretends to fall asleep.)

Because you demanded it!

2007-01-30T14:13:00.000-06:00

I'm back. That's the fun part of the English language. "You" is plural, as in "All of you demanded that I update", but it can also be singular, like "None of you cared that I hadn't updated except for you, Joanna." Thanks for the kick in the butt, J.

It honestly wasn't that I was waiting for someone to comment on the Spring Break home (although the envy is nice), I have just been simultaneously busy beyond belief and bored beyond comprehension. In other words, tons has been going on, but nothing worth blogging about.

That all changed last night, as Jennifer and I got to enjoy what we entitled, "the date of juxtaposition!" As some of you know, I am at least a little but of a professional wrestling fan (although not as much of a wrestling fan as I am a comic book fan). Jennifer very sweetly found out that WWE's Monday Night RAW was coming to the American Airlines Center last night and bought tickets for us (yes, she even went herself). Before the opening bell, however, we decided to "grab some food". I put that in quotes, because the hope really was that we would find someplace quick, easy, and cheap, yet still "date-worthy", for food. However, we both really wanted to try someplace that we hadn't eaten at before. That led us to Pappa's Steak House, which was neither quick, nor easy, nor (and let me emphasize this) cheap. We were magically transported to a swanky 1940's era resturant where all the waitstaff wear tuxedo's and they look down on you for not wearing one as well. The food was good, but let me just say that I haven't spent this much at a resturant without having meat served to me on swords.

From the hoity-toity resturant, we made our way to the American Airlines center for RAW. The juxtaposition didn't really hit me until we finally found our spot in the parking garage. We were a little early, so Jennifer and I sat in the car making small talk, not noticing the truck that pulled up beside us. We did, however, notice when the driver got out and proceeded to relieve himself on his own front tire.

Attempting to erase that image from our minds, we made our way in to the AAC. The wrestling was good, although I'm getting too old to deal with hyperactive teenage girls screaming their undying love for disinterested WWE superstars and fat balding guys on their third jumbo cup of beer.

What was interesting to me at the event was a sequence involving, oddly enough, Vince McMahon and Donald Trump. Apparently they are trying to feign a feud in the vein of Donald and Rosie, and last night that manifested itself in Donald Trump dumping a bunch of money on the crowd. If you watched the show (and honestly, why would you have?) you would have seen excited fans showing their newly acquired $100's, $50's, and $20's. In one of my more philosophical moments of the night, I watched this crowd pushing and shoving each other, all dignity and self restraint lost in the hope of an unearned dollar. I saw how excited little kids were as they picked up these little green pieces of paper, and I wondered what the money would be spent on. Would what they bought bring them as much joy as this unearned gift? After it faded, or spoiled, or was consumed, would they reflect back on the person they had acted rudely towards to get it?

We've been given an unearned gift as well. Not money that brings momentary happiness and is then lost, but an eternal home purchased with the blood of Christ. We don't have to push and fight against others for this gift, because it is free to all. Why aren't we holding this gift up for all to see, smiling like an idiot because our good fortune?

Spring Break Post Two

2007-01-24T15:43:00.000-06:00

Nobody liked my deeply theological, although admittedly rushed, post, so how about more pictures of our rented vacation retreat?

Here is where we will eat while looking out on the sound.

Here is the kitchen, where we would make food if we weren't on vacation and planning on eating out every meal.

Another view of the living room, where I will fall asleep after eating big meals in the fancy home. Did I mention that we really like food?

Okay, I know I'm being really annoying about this, but we are beyond excited. To explain why I am so happy, here is a picture of the Sea Foam Motel where I usually stayed when my family came to the Outer Banks of North Carolina.

Lovely, isn't it?

The 5 minute post

2007-01-23T07:56:00.000-06:00

I have kids coming literally in five minutes, but I need to update. LIfe has started to get in a routine for us lately, which I suppose is good if you like that sort of thing. The mornings seem to start earlier, and the nights end later, so I think I am sleep deprived. Ayway, I preached at Baker Blvd. this last Sunday in a sermon that could only be called "Meh." The idea was clear in my head, but the execution was not as crisp as I would have liked. The general point of it is the realization that once we emerge out of the waters of baptism we are a new creation, even though we still struggle with all the things we struggled with before baptism. In looking at this phenomenon, I felt it important to encourage all of us to be more loving to one another. For so many of us our native language is guilt, and when we see our brothers and sisters struggling with sin we try to "guilt" them out of it instead of encouraging them through the temptations of life. We judge too quickly and to0 easily. I'm a sinner, fallen and beyond hope other than the hope found in the sacrifice of Christ, who am I to look down my nose at you for the struggles you are going through? Take care, everybody.

So, When does Spring Break Start?

2007-01-14T14:16:00.000-06:00

Yeah, I changed my template again.

This post is about two months early, but I was just too excited to wait. Jennifer and I took advantage of our suddenly free Sunday morning today to book our Spring Break vacation. As we have told some of you, we are heading to the Outer Banks of North Carolina in March, home of the Wright Brothers first flight and most of my summer vacations growing up. The reason that we are so excited is because it will be our first trip together sans friends or family since our honeymoon six and a half years ago. Yeah, we would have enjoyed this even if we were going to lovely downtown Hoboken. Visiting the beach makes it all the sweeter. I may do some updates in the weeks and months to come as we prepare our itenerary, but today, would you settle for pictures of our (rented) vacation home?

Here is the front view. It has three levels, and they are all ours for seven days!

Here is the private pool. To the left of the picture you can see the hot tub, and to the right is the "Tiki Bar".

Here is one of the four bedrooms, and the prettiest that I can see from the pictures. It comes with a flat screen TV, because even though we are vacation, Jennifer and I don't ever miss our shows.

On the top level is the "great room", which really looks great if you ask me. It also comes with a beautiful view of the Sound, so we will make sure to get pictures for you. Since there is complementary Hi Speed Internet service, you may get some on site blog entries.

If you can't tell, I'm a little excited about this. BTW, Joanna taught me how to move pictures around in a blog, so this post is dedicated to her.

A Very Brief Post

2007-01-10T16:13:00.000-06:00

As you can see, I took care of the big space at the top of my blog by changing my template, although it appears that the real culprit was the oversized picture of Superman I had on here. I unfortunately had to delete the "Jennifer has Super Powers" entry, which was one of my favorites.

If you hadn't noticed, Joanna has been kicking my butt on the updating of the blog. Stop by her site if you get a chance.

I'm on my way to pick up comics in a few minutes (Justice Society of America, Thunderbolts, and Welcome to Tranquility are eagerly anticipated this week). I have had to make some tough cuts, but I think that I will make my budget this month.

What I am about to say has to be understood in context. Most of you know that I can be a somewhat extravagant person. I'm like most of us in the fact that I like getting what I want, but there is also something in me that is kind of digging the restraint aspect of my life under the budget. When I figured out that I could live in my comic book budget, I got a tremendous sense of accomplishment. It is interesting to consciously choose to live beneath your means, to look at your life and divide the essentials from the superfluous things that clog up our lives. So, my question to you is what are your essentials? What could you live without if you really had to? In the picture above, you see a couple of my essentials.

Have a great day!

Randomosity

2007-01-03T12:35:00.000-06:00

I've got several post ideas running through my head right now, so this might be a potpurri.

First of all, does anyone know why I've got this ginormous space at the top of my blog? It bugs me to no end, appeared out of nowhere, and I would dearly like it to go away. Any suggestions?

Secondly, have you come to confession lately? Bryan Wilhite and I are teaching about confession on Sunday mornings in a class that I'm really enjoying. Currently there are 8 of us showing up with any frequency, so there are still spots available.

Thirdly, Jennifer and I had an interesting, albeit brief, conversation about our favorite movie of 2006. I learned that it is very difficult to remember all the movies you see in a year without some sort of visual aid, so I'm going to try to save my ticket stubs this year so I can look back with a clearer perspective on great movies of 2007. As for 2006, I voted for Pulse, which was scary, entertaining, thought provoking, and stars Veronica Mars' protagonist Kristen Bell. What is your vote?

Finally, I guess I ought to talk about New Years resolutions in much the same way as Kelly and Wade did. Generally speaking, I'm not someone who does resolutions, but I do have a couple this year.

Enforce the school dress code more effectively- I have often complained that I spend more time fixing problems then teaching class. I have also often complained that kids dress in wildly inappropriate ways. What can I say, I'm getting old and I don't want to have to see 12 year olds' boxer shorts anymore, so I'm going to give up 30 seconds of class time a day to teach those kids where their waist is.
Be More Organized- I am not, by nature, an organized person. As a result, I find myself constantly reinventing the wheel every year. Beri gave me some excellent suggestions about how to plan in such a way that I can teach effectively and still experience less stress.
Stick to a budget- A few scant years ago, I was making almost $12,000 a year at the UPS store, and now I make somewhere closer to $40,000. Yay, me. Unfortunately, I've completely forgotten what it was like to have to make due on that little sum. We are making a conscious effort to eat out less (except on Sunday's when we really let loose), and I am sadly having to cut my comic book expenses down significantly. I have already decided to stop collecting 16 series, so I may be losing my status as the consumate comic book geek.
Be Happier- Okay, I may offend here. Have you ever noticed that there are never Islamic terrorists at an amusement park? I caught the tail end of a documentary the other day wherein a group of Jewish, Muslim, and Christian kids were put together and forced to sight see in Israel and Spain. The conversation among these groups was very tense in Israel, as they were surrounded by solemn religious iconography and symbols of ageless, endless battle. In Spain, however, they went to an amusement park and a nightclub. The conversation relaxed, all three groups began to smile and be happy. They still were able to talk about their differences, but the tone of the conversation became one of inquiry and not judgment. It occured to me that you never see Islamic terrorists in amusement parks, because who would want to become a suicide bomber once they've gone down a log flume or had a funnel cake? Once we see how much happiness there can be in the world, perspective sort of takes care of itself. I'm going to strive to see the beauty and happiness that God has placed in this world for me, because I think it will help me overcome the little things that take me off course.

Well, there you go. Do you have any resolutions you would like to share?

Random Warm Fuzzies and Meetings

2006-10-24T16:06:00.000-05:00

Wow, a bunch of you are really lurkers. If you scroll down just a little ways, you will see that my last post got zero comments, making me feel as if I wasn't read at all, but it seems that everyone knew my situation at Church when I missed class. Thank you for reading, even if you are awfully quiet.

I really did feel your prayers, by the way. Friday was horiffic, as I spent most of my time either asleep or in agony. By Friday night, however, I became convinced that I wouldn't die. Saturday wasn't wonderful, but it was a tip toe through tulips compared to Friday. Slowly on Sunday, I began to feel like the human I should be. I'm still sniffling and have a scratchy throat, but I really feel like your prayers went a long way in getting me up and on my feet.

Ironically, it was in your midst that I felt myself climbing over the hump. There was a specific moment at the Fall Festival (I think it was about the 36th time Maggie Dye got in line to bob for apples [okay, by that time, it was bobbing for whatever candy would float]) that I smiled at how cute the kids were and suddenly realized that I was lost in the rush of others happiness. I hadn't thought about how sick I was for more than an hour. I hate to steal from Wade, but it is amazing how focusing on others helps us to overcome our own self focus.

Sunday is going to be busy. Eric and I are teaching this Sunday morning on how to use technology for evangelism (Read: Eric is teaching on this while I will make a couple of comments about post modernity). In between class and church service, there is a quick leadership meeting. Immediately after church service, there is a quick nursury meeting. Immediately after church service (but hopefully not as immediately as the nursury meeting) there is a not at all quick adult education meeting. It is certainly a good thing that I draw so much strength and happiness from all of you, because I'm certainly going to be seeing a lot of you this Sunday.

I want to be great

2006-10-10T12:35:00.000-05:00

I'll make this short because the rain is already making my kids squirrelly, and the last thing they need is an unattentive teacher. I slept fitfully last night, kept awake by a barely tangible sense of dissatisfaction. When I was a kid, I dreamt of great things. I was going to be a professional wrestler, super hero, and the president of the United States. As I have grown, my dreams have become more commonplace, less grandiose, but I still don't feel like I've accomplished these goals. I want to be great:

I want to be a great husband- I haven't loved Jennifer selflessly enough. I haven't thought about making her life easier, even if it causes me inconvenience. I don't help out enough around the house.
I want to be a great son- My family doesn't get along. I haven't called my parents "just because" in too long. I haven't prayed for reconcilliation in my family.
I want to be a great friend- I haven't loved you all deeply enough. I haven't opened myself, risking ridicule, so that you can see the real me, giving you permission to show me the real you.
I want to be a great teacher- I don't plan ahead well enough. I don't come up with engaging lessons that inspire my apathetic students. I should be smarter and use big words in common conversation to demonstrate to the students the power of language.
I want to be a great Christian- I get angry. I get frustrated. I'm materialistic. I lust. I don't pray or read my Bible nearly enough. I'm too opaque. People see me and not Christ in me.

There is no punch line here. Just a quick look into my head (at least where it is right now). Sorry it doesn't come with a better view.