Pointless Post No. Whatever

I should update, but I have less than nothing to say. So, instead of putting monumental effort into what will ultimately be a sub-par post, here are some quick and random thoughts.

1. My students are whining, and I'm frustrated because I want to whine to. I feel lousy again (so tired of battling sickness). I have a Doctor's appointment this afternoon because of my lovely wife's insistence, which I am thankful for because I will feel better, but hate because it makes me feel like I'm giving up my man card.

2. Nothing is worse than a day when school is almost called off by weather. My classes are seeing about 60% attendance even though there was absolutely nothing wrong with the streets this morning.

3. I'm really tired of stealing copyrighted images of the web, but I lost the dohicky that connects my digital camera to my laptop, so all I have are ancient pictures like these:







4. The last picture makes me remember that I have been having really vivid dreams about Booger lately. In these dreams I'm trying to catch him (sometimes to give him medicine, sometimes just to keep him safe). I can never quite get to him and he just disappears. I'm really wanting to get a new cat, maybe because I miss the companionship (Duchess hates me), maybe because I think it will exorcise me of these dreams. Last night, we learned that Jennifer and I are going to hit a roadblock when it comes to cat names because she has some weird issue with the number of syllables in a pets name (and she refuses to let me name it "Booster Gold the Cat".

5. I really want to see Cloverfield, and everyone I know apparently wants to see Cloverfield, but scheduling a night to watch Cloverfield seems like an impossibility. Maybe I can convince LaRae to use her newfound position to schedule another movie night.

Taking off our Masks

"Is there anyone that fails? Is there anyone that falls? Am I the only one in church today feelin' so small? 'Cause when I take a look around, everybody seems so strong. I know they'll soon discover that I don't belong. So I tuck it all away, like everything's okay. If I make them all believe it, maybe I'll believe it too. So with a painted grin, I play the part again, so everyone will see me the way that I see them."

- Casting Crowns "Stained Glass Masquerade"

Last week saw great discussion about politics, so if I were smart I would milk that with another political topic. Apparently, I'm not that smart, because I'm a little burned out on politics at the moment (even though the Michigan Primary is tonight). Instead, I'm in a bit of a theologically reflective mood, so that's what you get today.

One of the gifts that I got in my Christmas O' Plenty was the very good CD from Casting Crown, Lifesong. The above quote really resonates with me, largely because it is one of the three or four points that I always preach on when given an opportunity. I've said many times how difficult the church experience was for me growing up, largely because I lived in a not so perfect family and all I saw on Sunday morning were the shiny, happy people. As a result, I quickly learned that church was not the place for honest or heartfelt revelation. There was a disconnect between what was preached and what was lived.

It wasn't until college that I learned that this wasn't a necessary disconnect; that the way of Christ leads through the Garden of Gethsemane and not through the rose garden; that it was acceptable to pray (even publicly) for something more intimate than your great aunt's sinus infection. The Church of Christ isn't the clubhouse of the perfect, it is the haven for those of us who have been smashed against the rocks of life and find themselves all too often overwhelmed by the floods of our own making. Since learning this lesson, I have tried to live an authentic Christian life, acknowledging my fallenness and seeking the strength that comes from God and his Church to overcome my sin. Every day I struggle with one undeniable reality: I am not yet who I long to be, and I will never be until I am united with Christ.

As I hear the above quoted song, however, I am made to wonder if I carry on this struggle too quietly. Does my flurry of "service" on Sunday mornings, my occasionally well polished words, make people think I couldn't relate to their struggles, that the application process to my faith requires a perfect life. I'm not one of the happy, shiny people, and if I have led any of you to think I am, that I have it all together, I apologize to you.

A related point and a question: It is odd and seems fairly egotistical to think about how others see you, but I find myself asking that question often as of late. What sort of face do I show the world? How do I want people to see me? I don't want to be seen as the perfect person; the great spiritual leader. My feet are made of clay too fragile, and we have only one spirutal leader. I guess more than anything else, I want to be seen as someone who loves deeply and unhesitatingly. I know I have made more than a few of you uncomfortable by telling you that I love you, but I have resolved that with as many people as there are in the world who stumble through their lives feeling unloved and unlovable that I would not waste one opportunity to let someone know that they are cared about. I'd also like to be seen as someone who is loyal and dependable. I would like to think that if you needed something that you wouldn't hesitate to call me because you would know that I would drop everything for your sake. I would like to think that I am someone who can be counted on.

I'm not sure if I've acheived showing either of these traits to the world, but it is what I strive towards (remember that I am not yet who I long to be). How do you want the world to see you?

Math is Hard!

I have been plaqued by serious writer's block the last few weeks, thus the lack of posts. It isn't so much that I haven't had anything to say, since I should follow up on my Christmas O' Plenty, and I'm really dying to solicit feelings on the political primary season, but I just can't think of any way to make either of those topics interesting to anyone, even me. Just as I was about to doubt the future of this blog, my students gave me this ammunition (I swear all of this was said with deathly seriousness):

Me: You have 60 seconds to finish this assignment.

Polly (The names are changed to protect the goofy): Mister, isn't 60 seconds a minute?

Me: Yup.

Mark: Nu-Uh! I thought a minute was 100 seconds.

Me: Uh, Nope.

Brenda (Who really is usually smart): No, Stupid. A minute is 60 seconds. 100 seconds is 90 seconds.

Me: What? *Stifled Laughter*

Brenda: No, I mean 100 seconds is a minute and a half. *Big Confident Smile*

Me: Darn, our minute is up. Go ahead and turn your work in (and stop sleeping in math class!).